Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

This line graph illustrates the percentage of jobs in four sectors of economy in the particular country from 1960 and 2020.

Overall , it is clear that manufacturing had the highest figure while healthcare had the lowest . Most of the groups showed changes during the period .

In 1960 year , the figure for retail and agriculture was approximately 10 million in 1960 . From now retail increased gradually . But the agriculture decreased gradually in 2020 and reached at nearly 2 million .

Similarly , in 1960 healthcare was around 6 million . It went up around 5 million in 1993 . After that , it increased gradually and reached about 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. Furthermore, the content is incomplete; while you mention retail, agriculture, and healthcare, the manufacturing sector—which is clearly present in the graph—is entirely omitted from your analysis. The overview is also quite basic and lacks a clear summary of the most significant trends. To improve, ensure you address all categories provided in the prompt and provide a more comprehensive overview that highlights the most striking differences or similarities between the sectors over the 60-year period.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into short paragraphs, which is a positive start. However, the logical progression is weak. The use of cohesive devices is very limited and repetitive (e.g., 'In 1960 year', 'Similarly', 'After that'). The transition between sentences feels mechanical, and the lack of a cohesive structure makes the information feel like a list of isolated facts rather than a coherent summary. To improve, use a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each paragraph has a clear focus, connecting the data points more fluidly to show the relationship between the sectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is quite basic and repetitive. You frequently use the word 'figure' and 'increased/decreased' without much variation. There are also some awkward collocations and phrasing, such as 'In 1960 year' and 'reached at nearly 2 million'. To reach a higher band, you should incorporate more precise vocabulary to describe trends, such as 'fluctuated', 'remained stable', 'peaked', or 'experienced a sharp decline'. Expanding your range of synonyms for 'increase' and 'decrease' will also help demonstrate a more sophisticated control of the language.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The sentence structures are predominantly simple, with very few attempts at complex sentences. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'percentage of jobs in four sectors of economy' (missing 'the'), 'In 1960 year' (incorrect word order), and 'reached at nearly' (unnecessary preposition). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with spaces before commas. To improve, focus on using a mix of complex sentence structures, such as using subordinating conjunctions (e.g., 'while', 'although', 'whereas') to compare data points, and pay closer attention to basic article usage and prepositional accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.