Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-08

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The line chart illustrates the number of jobs in four areas of the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the four sectors fluctuated differently. Healthcare and retail were showing inclining trends, competing with other areas, while manufacturing and agriculture were presenting declining trends with huge differences in them over the period.

In the first quarter of the period, healthcare, retail, and manufacturing showed substantial growth in an upward trend from near 3, 10, and 20 million jobs in three sectors, respectively, up to 1980. Meanwhile, agriculture showed a downward trend in the period of 1980.

In the remaining part of the period, the manufacturing area faced a considerable decrease in jobs from about 20 million to less than 15 million over the span of the next 40 years. The retail sector accounted for a significant jump of approximately 5 million, surpassing the manufacturing industry. Whilst the healthcare had also surged from near 5 million to cross the other areas and come near retail one. However, agriculture had reduced the supply of jobs from near 3 million to a minimal 2 million.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.0
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response provides a clear overview and identifies the main trends for all four sectors. You successfully highlight the contrast between the growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the data reporting is occasionally imprecise. For instance, stating 'near 3, 10, and 20 million' is vague, and the description of the 1980 period is confusingly phrased. To reach a higher band, ensure that data points are cited more accurately and that the chronological progression is described with greater clarity. The main features are covered, but the analysis of the data could be more precise to fully satisfy the requirements of a Band 7.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. You use cohesive devices such as 'Meanwhile', 'In the remaining part', and 'Whilst' to connect ideas. However, some transitions feel slightly mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'huge differences in them'. The paragraphing is appropriate, and there is a clear progression of information from the start to the end of the period. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of cohesive devices and ensuring that the relationship between sentences is always explicit.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'fluctuated', 'substantial growth', and 'surpassing'. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. For example, 'inclining trends' is not standard English; 'upward trends' or 'rising trends' would be more natural. Similarly, 'reduced the supply of jobs' is slightly awkward in this context. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey your meaning, more precise and sophisticated lexical choices would elevate the response to a higher band.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'healthcare and retail were showing inclining trends' (the continuous aspect is unnecessary here) and 'the healthcare had also surged' (the article 'the' is redundant). Additionally, some phrasing is awkward, such as 'come near retail one'. While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to prevent a higher score. Focusing on article usage and verb tense consistency will help improve your accuracy.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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