Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-09

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the data about occupations in economy at four different divisions: manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in United States from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing accounted for the highest share throughout the period outstripping all other sectors. Meanwhile, agriculture leisure activities constituted the lowest reading. Additionally, retail and healthcare sectors shows notable shifts.

In 1960 to 1990, manufacturing stood at 15 million, before rising steadily to 20 million then it shows a steep drop in 2020. A similar upward trajectory was observed for healthcare, which increased gradually from 0 to 15 million over the 2020.

By 2000 to 2020, the retail accounted the second highest reading at 15 million. The two lines retail and healthcare sectors intersected in 2020 at approximately 15 million. the agriculture sector experienced a significant drop from 5 million to almost 0 in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 150 words, which significantly impacts the score. While the report identifies the main features and trends, the analysis is somewhat superficial. The overview is present but lacks clarity, particularly regarding the 'leisure activities' mention, which is not supported by the graph. The description of the data is generally accurate, but the under-length nature of the response means that the development of the trends is insufficient. To improve, ensure all data points are fully described and the word count is strictly adhered to by expanding on the comparisons between sectors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate, such as the phrase 'In 1960 to 1990' or 'By 2000 to 2020', which are not standard ways to introduce time frames. The progression of ideas is logical, moving from an overview to specific sector trends, but the transitions between sentences could be smoother. Referencing is generally clear, but the lack of sufficient length makes the overall flow feel slightly disjointed.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The range of vocabulary is adequate for the task, with terms like 'upward trajectory', 'steep drop', and 'intersected' used effectively. However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice, such as 'divisions' instead of 'sectors' and the inclusion of 'leisure activities', which is not a category shown in the graph. There are also minor errors in collocation, such as 'accounted the second highest reading' (missing 'for'). To reach a higher band, focus on using more precise terminology and ensuring collocations are natural.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('retail and healthcare sectors shows') and prepositional errors ('in United States' instead of 'in the United States'). Punctuation is also inconsistent, with some sentences starting with lowercase letters. While these errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Increasing the variety of complex structures and proofreading for basic grammatical accuracy will help improve this score.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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