Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-10
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line chart illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the US economy, namely manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare between 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it is clear that manufacturing accounted the maximum number of opportunities and with the passage of time it declined. While, healthcare has lowest number of jobs and it rose sharply during this period. In contrast, retail and agriculture have the same ratio and change with the time.
In 1960, manufacturing has maximum number of the posts its almost 15% and than it climbed around 20% in 1980. After that, it fell sharply and reached at 16% in 2000. In 2020 it almost at 13%. While, healthcare accounted the lowest employment levels almost 3% in 1960 whereas it slightly increased virtually 5% in 1980 an than it sharply increased between 1980 to 2020, it jut about 16%.
On the other hand, retail and agriculture have the same number of jobs just about 5% in 1960. After that, the opportunities in retail has increased 10% and in agriculture decreased in 1980, it almost 3% and than it declined gradually from 2000 to 2020 it around about 2%. Although, from 1980 to 2020 the opportunities in retail has increased an reached at 16%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors and identifies key trends, such as the decline in manufacturing and the rise in healthcare. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate; for instance, stating that retail and agriculture have the same ratio is not supported by the data, as they show distinct trends. The reporting of figures is sometimes imprecise, such as saying manufacturing was 'almost 15%' in 1960 when it was clearly higher. While the main features are highlighted, the analysis lacks the precision required for a higher band, and some data points are misread or described vaguely, which limits the clarity of the summary.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. For example, 'While, healthcare has lowest...' and 'an than it sharply increased' demonstrate poor control of linking words and transitions. The progression of ideas is sometimes disjointed, particularly in the final paragraph where the comparison between retail and agriculture becomes confusing. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences is hindered by grammatical errors that disrupt the logical development of the report.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and variety needed for a higher score. There is frequent repetition of basic verbs like 'increased', 'decreased', and 'declined'. Some word choices are awkward or incorrect, such as 'maximum number of the posts' and 'same ratio'. While the student attempts to use some topic-specific vocabulary, the lack of flexibility and the presence of errors in collocation and word formation mean the range is limited. The errors do not completely impede communication, but they do restrict the sophistication of the response.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response relies heavily on simple sentence structures, and attempts at more complex sentences frequently contain errors. There are consistent issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'manufacturing has maximum number', 'healthcare accounted the lowest'), missing articles, and incorrect preposition usage (e.g., 'reached at 16%'). Punctuation is also problematic, with commas often placed incorrectly or omitted. While the meaning is generally clear, the high frequency of grammatical errors throughout the text prevents it from reaching a higher band, as the control over complex structures is not yet established.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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