Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-10

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

This graph illustrates about th job opportunities in millions among four different sectors of economy including manufacturing, retail, agriculturee and healthcare in United States between the years 1960 and 2020.

Overall, the line graph shows the upward trend for retail and healthcare but a decrease in the fields of maunufacturing and agriculture contrasting the years 1960 and 2020.

Initially, during the first 20 years, all the departments have provided with more job facilities than the year 1960 except for agriculture which experienced a fall from 6 million to half af its value. However, it remained stable for the next 2 decades and then gradually falls to 2 million till the year 2020.

Further considering retail and healthcare , they have shown a steady rise in the number of jobs anfd till the year 2020 , both were offering the same number of jobs to almost 16 millions of people, although , they have a difference of 4 millions in the starting years. The manufacturing sector has a maximum number of jobs (15 millions) in the start but after the years 1980 it has shown a decrease from 20 to 13 millions.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors and provides a clear overview of the trends. You have successfully identified the main features, such as the upward trend in retail and healthcare and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, there are some inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, you mention manufacturing had 15 million jobs at the start, but the graph shows it closer to 20 million. Additionally, the statement that retail and healthcare reached 16 million by 2020 is a good observation, but the claim that they had a 4 million difference in the starting years is not clearly supported by the visual data. More precise data extraction would improve the score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is logically organized into an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs. The progression of ideas is generally clear. You use some cohesive devices like 'However', 'Initially', and 'Further considering', which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are a bit mechanical, and the referencing is occasionally slightly confusing, such as in the final sentence where the timeline mentioned ('after the years 1980') does not perfectly align with the visual evidence provided. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different trends.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

You demonstrate an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, using terms like 'upward trend', 'stable', and 'gradually falls'. There are several spelling errors, such as 'th' (the), 'maunufacturing', 'anfd', and 'af' (of), which are distracting. While you attempt to use topic-specific vocabulary, the word choice is sometimes slightly unnatural, such as 'job facilities' instead of 'job opportunities' or 'employment figures'. To reach a higher band, focus on accuracy in spelling and more precise collocations related to data description.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors, such as 'illustrates about th job opportunities' (the 'about' is unnecessary), 'contrasting the years' (which is used incorrectly here), and 'provided with more job facilities' (passive voice error). Subject-verb agreement and preposition usage also need attention, for example, 'they have a difference of 4 millions'. While these errors do not prevent the reader from understanding your main points, they occur frequently enough to limit the score. Focus on proofreading for basic subject-verb agreement and article usage.

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