Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-11
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.5)
The line graph illustrate the number of employments in four sectors from 1960 to 2020 in the US.
it shows the number of jobs in healthcare sector increase the most on the other hand in agriculture number of profession decline in the given period of time.
at the start number of jobs in retaile above 5 million and number incraesess very fast in 2000 it reached the same number as manufacturing in 1960 by the end of time period it take a minimum increas above the previous the number of jobs in healthcare sector below 5 million and slightly increases in the 1980 it reached 5 million after 4 decaeds it boost more than 15 millions in 1960 jobs for farmers as same as retail after two decades it decreases and reamined same as the healthcare were at start in 2020 in the begining the number of jobs available for manufacturing departrment are 15 million and after increase the 5 million in the next 20n years it started decreasing and in the end it below 15 millions
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address all parts of the prompt by describing the trends for four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key features, such as the growth in the healthcare sector and the decline in agriculture, are mentioned. However, the response struggles with clarity and precision in reporting specific figures. For instance, the statement 'in 2000 it reached the same number as manufacturing in 1960' is confusing and inaccurate regarding graph interpretation. The overview lacks a clear summary of the main overall trends. Ideas are present but under-developed due to poor expression and a lack of structured comparison, placing this response at Band 5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text suffers from a major structural flaw: it is written as a single, massive run-on paragraph without any logical division or paragraphing. Cohesive devices are virtually absent, with the student relying on lowercase letters at the start of sentences and minimal punctuation. There are no clear logical markers to guide the reader through the progression of data. Referencing is frequently unclear, such as ambiguous pronouns like 'it' and 'they'. Overall organization is lacking, which severely impedes the flow of information. This corresponds to Band 4.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is very basic and repetitive, with frequent misspellings such as 'retaile' for retail, 'incraesess' for increases, and 'decaeds' for decades. The student attempts to use sector-specific terminology like 'healthcare', 'agriculture', and 'manufacturing', but lacks the lexical range needed for precise reporting. Phrases like 'take a minimum increas' and 'boost more than' demonstrate awkward collocations and limited control over word choice. Communication is hindered by these lexical limitations and spelling errors, warranting a Band 4.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The response exhibits very limited grammatical control. Almost the entire text consists of a continuous stream of poorly constructed clauses joined incorrectly or missing punctuation altogether. There is a complete lack of complex sentence structures used accurately, and basic subject-verb agreement is frequently broken, as seen in 'the line graph illustrate' and 'number of jobs... increase'. Punctuation is largely ignored, and capitalization at the start of sentences is missing throughout. Errors are extremely frequent and often obscure the intended meaning, matching the descriptors for Band 4.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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