Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four major departments of economy in the USA from 1960 to 2020.
Manufacturing business has the highest job vacancies in 1980, but starts to decrease between after this surge. However, the retail sector has showed a constant increase in number between 1960 and 2020.
The agriculture department has more jobs in 1960 then begun to decline from 1980 to 2020 because nowadays people prefer professions which offer high salaries.
In this contemporary society, healthcare department is flourishing. Back in 1960, it had lowest number of vacancies but it started to increase by establishing various sub-departments. Now it has reached at retail highest level.
Overall, all fields show different numbers at different times but retail and healthcare departments are recruting more people while agricultre sector has failed in providing work to the public.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to summarise the graph by identifying some main features, such as the trends in the retail and agriculture sectors. However, there are significant factual inaccuracies in reading the data; for instance, stating that manufacturing had the highest job vacancies in 1980 and that healthcare had the lowest number of vacancies in 1960. Furthermore, the response relies on unsupported personal commentary, such as explaining that agriculture declined 'because nowadays people prefer professions which offer high salaries', which is not provided in the graph. Crucially, the response falls short of the 150-word minimum, containing only 141 words. Because of these factors, the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is structured into an introduction, several body paragraphs, and a brief concluding sentence, showing an attempt at logical organisation. However, the progression of ideas is frequently disrupted by awkward transitions and confusing logic, such as jumping between different time periods and sectors without clear overarching signposting. Cohesive devices are used minimally and sometimes inappropriately, such as 'However' and 'Back in 1960'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the paragraphs are very short and underdeveloped, failing to group related information effectively.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to convey basic ideas about employment sectors, but it is limited and repetitive. The student attempts some less common vocabulary items, such as 'flourishing', 'contemporary society', and 'sub-departments', but these are often accompanied by word choice and collocation errors, such as 'departments of economy', 'retail highest level', and 'recruting'. There are also spelling errors, including 'agricultre' and 'recruting'. While meaning is generally conveyed, the lexical control is not strong enough to reach a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some variety. However, grammatical accuracy is weak throughout the text. There are frequent errors in verb tenses, such as 'has showed', 'has more jobs in 1960 then begun', and 'reached at retail highest level'. Article usage is also problematic, as seen in 'healthcare department is flourishing' and 'it had lowest number'. Punctuation and prepositions contain occasional slips. Although these errors do not completely impede communication, their frequency noticeably lowers the overall accuracy of the writing.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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