Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The rendered line graph illustrates the information of employs in 4 sector of the economy between 1960 and 2020 in the US. The data is calibrated in figures.
Overall, it is crystal clear that number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, [redacted phone] and they reveals this units in four categories one is manufacturing, second is retail, third is agriculture, and fourth is healthcare.
Having a myopic look, it becomes lucid that manufacturing retail has the highest value in this line graph which is in millions and if we look closely to the numbers then the manufacturing has highest value of 20 million in 1980 and on the other hand retail has 16 million in 2000.
Furthermore, it can be vividly seen that the agriculture has the lowest value in this line graph which is lowest then other three categories and if we talked about the number so the agriculture has the highest value of near 6 million in 1960 and lowest is 1 million in 2020 and the last category of this graph healthcare if we look closely the healthcare has highest value similar as retail which is near to 16 jobs in the year 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.5 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address the prompt by reporting on the four sectors of employment shown in the graph. An overview is attempted, but it is confused by repetitive phrasing and redundant language, as seen in the statement "crystal clear that number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020". Key features are identified, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and agriculture declining to 1 million in 2020. However, the lack of a clear, cohesive introduction and the presence of vague statements prevent the response from fully developing all trends. While the main features are touched upon, the lack of structural clarity places this in the lower-middle range.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.5
The response is divided into paragraphs, but the overall organisation is hindered by mechanical transitions and poor logical sequencing. Phrases like "Having a myopic look, it becomes lucid that" are unnatural and awkwardly implemented. The student relies on repetitive connectors such as "and if we look closely" or "furthermore, it can be vividly seen that" which fail to create a smooth progression of ideas. Referencing is frequently unclear, particularly when jumping between categories without proper signposting. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion is weak and repetitive throughout the text.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
Vocabulary usage is limited and heavily repetitive. Words like "value", "highest", and "category" are overused throughout the response. The student attempts less common vocabulary phrases such as "myopic look" or "calibrated in figures", but these are either inappropriate for academic contexts or awkwardly deployed. There are also direct lexical inaccuracies, such as "employs" instead of "employment" or "employees", and referring to 16 jobs rather than 16 million jobs in the final sentence. While the vocabulary is adequate to convey basic data points, the frequent inaccuracies restrict the score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control is weak. Sentences are frequently over-extended and run-on, relying heavily on coordinating conjunctions like "and" rather than proper punctuation or subordination. For instance, the second sentence of the overview connects multiple clauses awkwardly. There are frequent grammatical errors, including missing articles ("the manufacturing retail", "the agriculture"), incorrect word forms ("employs"), and preposition errors ("lowest then other three"). These errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader in untangling the intended meaning.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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