Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The provided graph illustrates the number of occupations in manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, and Healthcare in the United states measured in millions from year 1960 and 2020.

Overall, Manufacturing was the largest employer at the begining of the period but it declined slightly at the end of the period. Retail and Healthcare sector showed increment in jobs while Agriculture experienced slight decline.

Detailed analysis of graph revealed that the number of jobs in manufacturing started with 15 millions in 1960 which rose initially, peaked at about 19million in 1980 ,before falling gradually to approxiately to 11 million in 2020

. The number of job in retail increased significantly from 6 million in 1960 to approximately 16 million in 2020. In contrast, there is slight decrease in number of jobs in agriculture which is approximately 6million in the initial year but it decreased to 3million in 2020.

Jobs in healthcare rose steadily from 2million in 1960 to approximately 14 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by identifying and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors over the given timeframe. An adequate overview is provided, highlighting the general trends such as manufacturing starting as the largest employer before declining, retail and healthcare increasing, and agriculture experiencing a slight drop. Key data points are selected and reported, including starting and ending figures like manufacturing falling to approximately 11 million in 2020 and retail growing to 16 million. However, some figures contain minor inaccuracies or awkward phrasing, such as "15 millions" and "about 19million". Despite these minor issues, the overall response effectively covers the scope of the visual data.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is organized logically into an introduction, an overview paragraph, and body paragraphs detailing individual sectors. Cohesive devices such as "Overall", "In contrast", and "before falling" are used to connect ideas, though some formatting and punctuation issues disrupt the flow, such as the stray period preceding the paragraph about retail. Paragraphing is used adequately to separate the overview from detailed body content. While the logical progression is generally clear, referencing and cohesion can occasionally feel somewhat mechanical.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully employing terms related to data trends such as "declined slightly", "increment", "peaked", and "rose steadily". However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors throughout the text, including "begining" (spelling error), "increment" instead of "an increase", and awkward phrasing like "Detailed analysis of graph revealed". Less common lexical items are attempted but occasionally lack precision, placing this response firmly in the Band 6 range.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and time markers effectively. There are, however, several grammatical errors throughout the response, including missing articles ("The number of job in retail"), preposition errors ("approxiately to 11 million"), and minor punctuation issues. Despite these errors, the meaning is generally clear and communication is not severely impeded, reflecting a typical Band 6 performance for grammatical control.

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