Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
As demonstrated in the graph, information regarding the number of jobs in the major four sectors of economy in the US has been given. To begin with, take look at the number of jobs in the Manufacturing sector. In the year 1960, the number of jobs in millions is about 15 which undergoes an upward climb up to 20 millions in the year 1980. In addition to the manufacturing sector, there is the retail sector which has jobs in the number of about 6 million, and increases drastically throughout the time until the year 2000. After the year 200, the jobs number in the retail sector increases very slightly. Another key point to consider is the agriculture sector, which underwent a significant downfall by the passage of time. At start, the number of jobs is about million in number and it persist to fall to the minimum of 2 million in number until the year 2000. Lat but not the least sector is that of healthcare, which is undergoing an upward climbing steadily, increasing the number of jobs in million from about 3 million to 15 million. The number of jobs in the agriculture and healthcare sector were the same in the year 1976. Consequently, the highest number of jobs in the US are in the fields of Healthcare and Retail in the last given year, 2000.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address all four economic sectors shown in the graph, reporting initial figures and subsequent trends, such as the manufacturing sector rising to 20 million in 1980 and the retail sector increasing over time. However, there are notable omissions and inaccuracies in data reporting, such as stating the agriculture sector dropped to '2 million in number until the year 2000' and mentioning the final year as 2000 instead of 2020. The overview is weak, consisting merely of a concluding detail rather than a synthesized summary of major trends. Because key features are under-developed and some data points are incorrectly interpreted, this performance aligns closely with Band 5 descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response suffers significantly from poor paragraphing, as it is presented as one single, dense block of text rather than distinct logical paragraphs. Although basic cohesive devices are used to transition between ideas, such as 'To begin with', 'In addition to', and 'Another key point', the lack of structured paragraphs disrupts the overall progression. Referencing is occasionally awkward or confusing, such as 'Lat but not the least sector is that of healthcare'. The arrangement of ideas feels somewhat mechanical and lacks clear visual and structural separation for different parts of the data. This level of organization reflects Band 5 criteria.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range to communicate basic information about the graph, utilizing terms like 'manufacturing sector', 'retail sector', 'agriculture sector', and 'healthcare'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward phrasings throughout the text, such as 'take look at', 'the jobs number', 'underwent a significant downfall by the passage of time', and 'upward climbing steadily'. Spelling errors also occur, such as 'Lat' instead of 'Last'. While meaning is generally conveyed, the frequent reliance on basic or slightly incorrect word choices places this response firmly at Band 5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but many complex attempts contain grammatical errors or awkward phrasing, such as 'In the year 1960, the number of jobs in millions is about 15 which undergoes an upward climb' and 'At start, the number of jobs is about million in number and it persist to fall'. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'it persist', 'The number of jobs... were'), article usage (e.g., missing words like 'about a million'), and tense consistency. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader, matching the requirements for Band 5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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