Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line line shows the number of occupations in the four sectors of the US economy from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, the manufacturing sector recorded the highest proportion and then declined over the years. In contrast, the healthcare sector recorded the lowest proportion and then rose steadily over the years.

Firstly, the manufacturing sector accounted for the largest share with 20 million jobs in 1980 and declined from 1990 to 2020. The retail sector had 5 million occupation in 1960 and increased throughout the years from 1980 to 2020.

Finally, the healthcare sector had around 3 million jobs in 1960 and exceeded from 3 million to approximately 16 million jobs in 2020 in economy sector. The agriculture sector had around 5 million jobs in 1960 and flunctuated over the years between 1980 and 2020. Overall, the manufacturing and healthcare occupation increased, whereas reatil and agriculture jobs declined over the years from 1960 to 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the main features of the chart showing job numbers in four US economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided, noting that manufacturing declined while healthcare rose, and some comparisons are made. However, there are notable inaccuracies and contradictions in the data reported. For instance, the student states that the manufacturing sector accounted for the largest share with 20 million jobs in 1980, and later concludes that both manufacturing and healthcare occupations increased, whereas the graph indicates manufacturing experienced a steady decrease from 1960 onwards. Additionally, the final summary contradicts earlier statements by claiming manufacturing increased. These inaccuracies in data reporting prevent the response from achieving a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The response is structured into multiple paragraphs, including an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs, showing an attempt at logical organisation. However, the progression of ideas is hindered by contradictory statements, particularly between the body paragraphs and the final concluding sentences. Cohesive devices are used minimally and somewhat mechanically, such as 'Overall', 'Firstly', and 'Finally'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the grouping of ideas lacks consistency, with the final paragraph combining multiple disconnected points about different sectors and contradictory summaries. Referencing and logical flow require greater control to ensure a smooth progression of information throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for discussing economic sectors and statistical trends, such as 'proportion', 'sector', 'accounted for', 'increased', and 'declined'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'The line line shows', '5 million occupation' (should be 'occupations' or 'jobs'), and 'flunctuated' (misspelling of 'fluctuated'). Furthermore, the misuse of the phrase 'in economy sector' demonstrates limited control over collocations. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey basic information, these errors and repetitions constrain the lexical score to the band 5 level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response displays a mix of simple and some attempted complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors and awkward constructions throughout the text, such as 'The line line shows', 'exceeded from 3 million to approximately 16 million jobs', and the contradictory conclusion sentences. Prepositional and verb form errors are noticeable, such as omitting necessary pluralisation ('5 million occupation'). Although these errors occur frequently, they do not entirely obscure the overall meaning of the text, allowing the reader to follow the intended message despite the grammatical shortcomings.

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