Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The bar graph shows information about the number of occupations in the US economy in four sectors: manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing recorded the highest proportion among remaining three departments, and declined over the years. In contrast, agriculture declined, whereas retail and healthcare rose steadily over the years.

In 1960, manufacturing recorded the highest proportion among all four sectors. In 1980, manufacturing sharply increased and reached 20 million and then dropped over the years from 20 million to around 13 million in 2020. Secondly, agriculture sector was at the lowest proportion around 6 million and then declined over the years reached around 3 million in 2020.

In 1960, the healthcare department was at 2 million and surged over the years and reached almost 16 million, whereas retail was at around 6 million in 1960 and rose steadily throughout the years and reached 16 million in 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four sectors between 1960 and 2020. The overview effectively captures the general trends, noting that manufacturing declined while retail and healthcare rose steadily. Key data points are selected and reported, such as manufacturing reaching 20 million in 1980 before dropping to 13 million, and healthcare surging to almost 16 million. However, there are minor inaccuracies in data reporting and terminology; for example, the student refers to sectors as 'departments' and 'proportions' instead of numbers of jobs. Despite these minor lapses, the main trends and comparisons are clearly articulated, earning a solid Band 6.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response has a clear overall progression and is organized into logical paragraphs, with an introduction, an overview, and separate body paragraphs for different sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'In contrast', 'whereas', and 'and then' are used to connect ideas, though some transitional phrasing feels slightly mechanical or repetitive ('over the years' is used numerous times). Paragraphing is handled appropriately to separate distinct groups of information. Referencing is generally clear, though occasional mechanical repetition prevents the response from achieving a higher band. Overall, the logical organization and paragraphing support clear communication, aligning well with the descriptors for Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully attempting less common items related to graph description such as 'surged', 'steadily', 'declined', and 'proportion'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as using 'departments' instead of 'sectors', and confusing 'proportion' with absolute numbers of jobs. Spelling is generally accurate, but the lack of precise lexical control and occasional awkward phrasing limit the score. The vocabulary used is sufficient to convey the main message clearly without impeding communication, fitting the criteria for a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, incorporating clauses with 'whereas' and 'and then'. There are several grammatical errors and awkward structures, such as missing articles ('agriculture sector was at the lowest proportion') and repetitive verb phrases ('reached around 3 million'). Punctuation is generally acceptable, and while errors are present, they rarely impede communication. The control over complex structures is somewhat limited, and frequent minor slips place this response firmly in the Band 6.0 category, reflecting a mix of error-free simple sentences and flawed complex attempts.

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