Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The Graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy during in the US, between the period of1960 to 2020.
Overall, in 1960 Manufacturing sector recorded a highest jobs opening around 15 million approximately, whereas agriculture and Retail recorded a lower proportion close to 7 million. In contrast healthcare sector is one of the sector which is having the lowest figures recorded close to 2 million approximately.
In 1980, Same patterns follows manufacturing sector touches the highest jobs opportunities for the people around 20 million where retail and healthcare sector is having the slightly improvement around 10 million and 5 million respectively, whereas agriculture declines to 3 million jobs
2000 and 2020 remain worse for agriculture where healthcare ad retail having a good growth recorded and ended above 15 million at the end of 2020 whereas manufacturing sector record some decline shift and closes at 13 million approximately.
In conclusion, Manufacturing marked the highest scope at 20 million in 1980 where the lowest figures recorded from the agriculture sector in 2020. however, agriculture and retail sector remain consistent and shows a impressive growth throught out the tenure.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address the task by reporting on the number of jobs across the four sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key features are identified, such as the peak of the manufacturing sector around 1980 and the lower initial figures for agriculture and healthcare. However, the summary suffers from inaccuracies regarding the data. For instance, the text claims that agriculture and retail recorded close to 7 million in 1960 and that healthcare ended above 15 million in 2020, which misinterprets the visual information on the graph. Furthermore, some comparisons are incomplete or unclear, leading to a tendency to over-generalize rather than precisely report the trends. This places the response firmly at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which helps provide a basic structure. However, the overall progression is somewhat hampered by poor cohesive devices and repetitive linking words such as 'whereas' and 'where'. Sentences often run together awkwardly without proper punctuation, as seen in phrases like '2000 and 2020 remain worse for agriculture where healthcare ad retail having a good growth'. While the general arrangement is an attempt at an overview and body paragraphs, the mechanical use of cohesive devices and unclear referencing mean the response does not reach a Band 6.0, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptor well.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common words and industry-related terms like 'manufacturing', 'agriculture', 'retail', and 'healthcare'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'highest jobs opening', 'having the slightly improvement', and 'decline shift'. Spelling errors also occur, such as 'ad' instead of 'and' and 'throught out'. These errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader and reflect a limited and repetitive lexical range, which aligns with a Band 5.0 score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most complex sentence attempts are faulty and lack correct verb forms, for instance: 'healthcare sector is one of the sector which is having the lowest figures' and 'where retail and healthcare sector is having the slightly improvement'. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and punctuation, particularly run-on sentences and comma splices. These frequent errors disrupt the flow and occasionally cause comprehension difficulty for the reader, matching the Band 5.0 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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