Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line graph illustrates the figure of paid employment in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020
Overall, healthcare and retail jobs started at the lowest levels but rose significantly towards the end of the period, becoming the highest-paid employment sectors. In contrast, manufacturing had the highest figure at the beginning of the period; however, after rising slightly, it declined dramatically.
In 1960, manufacturing was the highest- paid employment stood at 15 millons, while it rose slightly in 1980 at 20 millons. However, it fell dramatically in whole period and stood 13 millons in 2020 less than starting point. Similarly, agriculture was stood at 6 millions, in 1960, and after that it started falling, in 1980 at 3 millons and in 2020.
In addition, healthcare was the lowest- paid employment in 1960 at 3 millions, after that it rose dramatically in whole period and at the end of the period it stood at 16 millons. Moreover, retail also shared a similar pattern in 1960 at around 6 millions and significatly increased in the whole period and became the highest- paid employment at 16 milllions same as healthcare.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons between the four economic sectors. An appropriate overview is provided, noting that healthcare and retail rose significantly while manufacturing experienced a decline. Key data points, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million in 1960 and healthcare ending at 16 million, are selected and reported accurately. While some details could be more thoroughly synthesised, the response clearly fulfills the requirements for a Band 6.5 to 7.0 level by presenting a clear picture of the overall trends and supporting them with specific figures.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The text exhibits a coherent overall arrangement with a logical progression from an introductory overview to specific body paragraphs detailing the trends. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different sectors. However, cohesion is sometimes faulty or mechanical, with awkward transitions like 'after that it rose dramatically in whole period' and repetitive referencing structures. Cohesive devices are employed, but their usage lacks the flexibility and smooth flow required for higher bands. Overall, the organizational structure is clear enough to guide the reader easily through the data.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, incorporating appropriate terms related to economic sectors and graphical trends, such as 'employment sectors', 'rose significantly', and 'declined dramatically'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors, such as 'millons' and 'significatly', as well as awkward phrasing like 'highest- paid employment stood at 15 millons'. Less common vocabulary is attempted with some inaccuracy. While these lexical errors do not impede communication, they prevent the response from achieving a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writing contains a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to use varied structures. However, there are frequent grammatical errors and punctuation slips throughout the text, including tense inconsistencies and awkward passive/active constructions like 'agriculture was stood at 6 millions'. Run-on sentences and comma splices also occur, such as in the third and fourth paragraphs. Although the meaning remains understandable and communication is rarely impeded, the frequency of errors places this response firmly in the Band 6 category.
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