Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The Line graph illustrate how employment level in million evolved across four US economic sector between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it is evident that manufacturing declined after peaking in 1980 while Healthcare and Retail grew steadily, with Agriculture remaining minimal and stable post in 1980.
Regarding to the highest figure, In 1960 Manufacturing employed 15 million workers that rise in 1980 to 20 million opportunities before falling drastically to 13 million by 2020. Conversely, Healthcare cllimbed from 3 million in 1960 to 20 million workforce by 2020. A similar pattern can be seen with the Retail sector starting at 6 million in 1960 over the period. Turning to the remaining sector, Agriculture hired 6 million workers at the staring that drops to 3 million in 1980 and has no significant changes thereafter.
On the whole, the employment shifted from tradition sectors towards the service based industries espeacially Healthcare and Retail showing the strong growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by identifying and reporting the main features of the graph while making relevant comparisons. An overview is provided, highlighting the peak and subsequent decline in manufacturing alongside the steady growth in healthcare and retail, while agriculture remained minimal. Key data points are cited to support the trends, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 before falling to 13 million by 2020, and healthcare climbing from 3 million to 20 million. The information is generally accurate and well-selected, meeting all the requirements for Task Achievement at a Band 7.0 level.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The response is organised logically into an introduction, an overview, body paragraphs detailing specific trends, and a concluding summary. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'Overall', 'Conversely', and 'Turning to the remaining sector'. However, there are minor issues with cohesion and referencing, such as the slightly awkward transition 'Regarding to the highest figure,' and the incomplete phrase 'starting at 6 million in 1960 over the period'. Paragraphing is used appropriately, giving the text a clear overall progression. This corresponds to a solid Band 6.5 or 7.0; given the clear logical organisation, a 6.5 is appropriate due to some mechanical phrasing.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, attempting less common items such as 'subsequent', 'drastically', and 'minimally'. However, there are several lexical errors and awkward word choices throughout the text, including 'cllimbed' (spelling), 'workforce' used where 'workforce' or 'jobs' might need different prepositions, 'tradition sectors', and 'espeacially' (spelling). Despite these errors, communication is not impeded, and the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the trends accurately. This performance aligns with the Band 6.0 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as relative clauses and participial phrases ('employing 15 million workers that rise in 1980...'). However, there are numerous grammatical and mechanical errors, including subject-verb agreement issues ('The Line graph illustrate', 'manufacturing ... that rise'), tense inconsistencies ('drops to 3 million in 1980 and has no significant changes'), and punctuation errors. These errors cause some disruption for the reader, though they do not entirely obscure the meaning. This sits comfortably within the Band 5.5 to 6.0 range, leaning towards a 5.5 due to the frequency of basic grammatical slips.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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