Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-12
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The line illustrates how employment levels in millions evolved across four US economic sectors between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, it is evident that manufacturing declined after peaking in 1980 while Healthcare and Retail grew steadily, with Agriculture remaining minimal and stable after 1980.
Regarding the highest figure, in 1960 Manufacturing employed 15 million workers that rose in 1980 to 20 million opportunities before falling drastically to 13 million by 2020. Conversely, Healthcare climbed from 3 million in 1960 to workforce size of 20 million by 2020. A similar pattern can be seen with the Retail sector starting at 6 million in 1960 over the period. Turning to the remaining sector, Agriculture hired 6 million workers at the staring that drops to 3 million in 1980 and has no significant changes thereafter.
On the whole, the employment shifted from traditional sectors towards the service-based industries especially Healthcare and Retail showing the strong growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5
The student successfully covers all parts of the task by providing a clear overview and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key trends are identified, such as manufacturing peaking in 1980 before declining, and the steady growth in healthcare and retail. Comparisons are appropriately made between the sectors, such as contrasting the decline in manufacturing with the upward trajectory of healthcare. The response is fully relevant to the prompt and presents a well-developed summary of the data without including irrelevant personal opinions or going off-topic. All major data points are accurately reported.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The response demonstrates clear logical organisation and progression throughout. Information is grouped reasonably well, starting with an introduction and overall trend summary, followed by body details and a concluding restatement. Cohesive devices are used to connect ideas, such as 'Overall', 'Regarding the highest figure', 'Conversely', and 'Turning to the remaining sector'. However, paragraphing is slightly condensed, with the body and conclusion merging closely into a single large paragraph structure. Referencing is generally clear, though paragraph separation could be improved to enhance visual and structural progression.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'evolved', 'peaking', 'declined', 'steadily', and 'drastically'. Less common vocabulary items are attempted, including 'opportunities' (used in place of workers/jobs) and 'workforce size', though some collocations and word choices are slightly unnatural or inaccurate. For instance, 'at the staring' contains a basic morphological error, and 'opportunities' is less precise than 'jobs' in this context. Nevertheless, the lexical range is sufficient to convey the intended meaning without impeding communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including relative clauses and introductory participial phrases like 'Turning to the remaining sector'. There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings present, such as 'that rose in 1980 to 20 million opportunities before falling drastically', 'at the staring that drops', and 'the employment shifted' (where 'employment' is used as an uncountable noun representing the total number of jobs, making the definite article unnecessary). Despite these errors, meaning is rarely impeded, and the sentence structures demonstrate an adequate range for an intermediate level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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