Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The graph illustrates the information about the number of employments in four different sectors manufacturing, Retail, agriculture and healthcare in the US between 1960and 2020.

Overall in the sectors of manufacturing had more jobs in first twenty years after this it’s went down. While agriculture had less job in those period of time.

In the year 1960 in the portion of retailer had 6 million employees its increased gradually and reached 16 million at the end of time 2020. While in the sector of healthcare just 3 million worker are worked out in the beginning of time which increased dramatically 16 million workers in the year 2020 which is same as retailers and its peaked point of worker.

Furthermore manufacturing had a larger number of workers 15 million at the start of time and reached in 20 million in the year of 1980 after this its went declined slightly 13 million in 2020. On the other hand in 1960, 6 million people worked in agriculture sector which is same retailers while it fall down minimally and reached 2 million in 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response covers all parts of the task by reporting data from all four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key features and comparisons are made, such as noting that manufacturing started high at 15 million and peaked in 1980, while healthcare and retail grew significantly to reach 16 million by the end of the period. However, the overview is somewhat weak, as the introductory sentence ('Overall in the sectors of manufacturing...') is grammatically confused and lacks a clear summary of the overarching trends across the entire graph. The response tends to list data points rather than fully synthesizing the broader economic shifts. Nevertheless, all four sectors are addressed with relevant details, aligning well with the descriptors for Band 6.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement and attempts to group information by sector across paragraphs. However, logical progression is frequently disrupted by poor cohesive devices, fragmented sentence structures, and abrupt transitions (e.g., 'after this it's went down', 'at the end of time 2020'). Paragraphing is present, but the internal flow within paragraphs is often mechanical and confusing due to run-on sentences and missing punctuation. Referencing and conjunctions are sometimes misused or omitted entirely, making it harder for the reader to follow the exact chronological progression without effort. These features place the response firmly in the Band 5 category for cohesion.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, successfully referring to economic sectors ('manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', 'healthcare') and numerical figures. However, there are frequent inappropriate word choices and non-standard collocations, such as 'number of employments' instead of 'employment numbers' or 'number of jobs', 'portion of retailer', and 'peaked point of worker'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but word formation errors (e.g., 'worker are worked out') and basic lexical limitations restrict precision. The vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the core data, but errors in word choice and collocation prevent it from reaching a higher band, justifying a score of 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple and awkwardly attempted complex sentences. There are frequent, noticeable grammatical errors throughout the text, including tense confusion ('its went down', 'worker are worked out', 'which is same retailers', 'it fall down'), missing prepositions, and lack of subject-verb agreement. Punctuation is largely neglected, resulting in run-on sentences that require the reader to pause and decipher the meaning. Because the attempts at complex structures are frequently faulty and errors occur consistently across the text, the performance fits the Band 4 descriptor.

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