Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-13
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph demonstrate the number of people employed across four distinct sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it indicates that retail and healthcare experienced the significant growth over the 60 decades. On the other hand, manufacturing and agriculture showed a declined over time.
In 1960, retail started up from 5 million and later goes up till 10 million in 1980 between 2000 to 2020, it experienced dramatic increase above 15 million in US employement ratio. Healthcare started from below 5 fluctuated overtime and experienced massive increase until reaches on 2020 showing the remarkable growth over the period.
Manufacturing experienced a substantial increase before declining, reached the point from 15 million in 1960 to 1980 on the employement ratio of 20 million later saw a decline continously until 2020, while agriculture remain steady in the beginning but later faced severe decline over a period.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to address the task by summarizing information from the graph, identifying general trends such as the growth in retail and healthcare, and the decline in manufacturing and agriculture. However, the overview is slightly inaccurate, as stating that these trends occurred over '60 decades' is mathematically incorrect. Furthermore, data selection is somewhat vague and imprecise in places (e.g., 'retail started up from 5 million and later goes up till 10 million'). While main features are touched upon, the response suffers from insufficient data support and vague descriptions, aligning with a Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response has an introduction and a brief overall statement, but the paragraphing and logical progression are weak. Sentences are run-on and lack clear structural boundaries, particularly within the body paragraphs where multiple distinct data points are crammed together without proper linking. Cohesive devices are minimal or misused (e.g., 'between 2000 to 2020, it experienced dramatic increase above 15 million in US employement ratio' without proper punctuation or transition). This overall lack of clear organization and mechanical cohesion places the response in the Band 5.0 category.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary adequate to convey basic trends, utilizing words like 'growth', 'decline', 'increased', and 'fluctuated'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'employement ratio' instead of employment figures or numbers, and awkward expressions like 'experience the significant growth over the 60 decades'. Spelling errors are also present, such as 'continously' instead of continuously, and 'remain' instead of remained. These errors cause some difficulty for the reader, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control is weak, leading to frequent grammatical errors and punctuation issues. Examples include subject-verb agreement and tense errors ('The line graph demonstrate', 'goes up', 'reached the point... to 20 million later saw a decline'). Many sentences are run-on structures lacking commas or conjunctions to separate distinct clauses properly. Due to the frequency of errors that occasionally impede smooth reading and obscure meaning, a Band 5.0 is appropriate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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