Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line chart illustrates the information about the number of employment in four different sectors of the economy in America between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, it is evident that retail and healthcare sectors experienced an upward trend over the period, the figures for manufacturing and agriculture sectors declined substantially. Additionally, manufacturing sector remained the dominated throughout the timeframe.

To begin with, manufacturing sector recorded the highest share of number of jobs at 15 million in 1960, this trend reached a peak of 20 million jobs in 1980. However, it was continuously decreasing, which stood to 6 million jobs in 2020. Retail sector accounted for the second largest share of jobs market at 6 million in 1960, it dramatically plumted to 15 million jobs in 2000.

Turning to the next details, starting year agriculture sector stood at 5 million, then it experienced steady declined over the period and which reached to 2.5 million in 2020. Healthcare sector had the smallest number of job at 2.5 miliion, it was seen significant rose. retails healthcare sector was overtaking manufacturing, it stood to 16 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response successfully covers all parts of the task by selecting and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. The overview effectively captures the upward trends in the retail and healthcare sectors versus the declines in manufacturing and agriculture, while also noting that manufacturing remained dominant overall. Key data points, such as the peak of 20 million for manufacturing in 1980 and the final figures in 2020, are included. However, there are some factual discrepancies in the data reporting and minor contradictions; for example, the text states retail plummeted to 15 million in 2000, which conflicts with standard interpretations of the visual data. Nevertheless, the main trends and comparisons are adequately presented, fulfilling the core requirements of Task Achievement at a Band 6.0 level.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organized into four paragraphs, including a clear introduction and an overall summary. Cohesive devices and transitional phrases are used to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Overall', 'To begin with', and 'Turning to the next details'. However, referencing and paragraph cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For instance, the transition 'retails healthcare sector was overtaking manufacturing' is confusing and lacks smooth integration. Paragraphing is attempted, but the final paragraph awkwardly crams multiple sectors together ('agriculture sector stood at 5 million... Healthcare sector had the smallest... retails healthcare sector'). Progression is present overall, but referencing errors and slightly clunky transitions place this criterion firmly at a Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common economic terms such as 'sector', 'upward trend', and 'proportion/share'. However, there are notable word-choice errors, awkward collocations, and spelling mistakes throughout the text. Examples include 'plumted' instead of plummeted, 'dominated' used as a noun instead of 'dominant', 'significant rose' instead of 'significant rise', and 'retails healthcare sector'. While these lexical errors do not completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough to restrict the score to Band 5.5, as the control over less common vocabulary lacks precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, with attempts at relative clauses and time clauses (e.g., 'which stood to 6 million jobs in 2020'). However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are several structural and prepositional errors, such as 'illustrates the information about the number of employment' (unnecessary prepositional phrasing), 'which stood to' (incorrect preposition), and comma splices like 'Retail sector accounted for the second largest share of jobs market at 6 million in 1960, it dramatically plumted'. Furthermore, tense consistency falters in places. These errors occur regularly across the text, limiting the score to a Band 5.5.

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