Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
This line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors between 1920 to 2020 in US In which manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare reporting in this chart graph
On one hand,the first line in graph of manufacturing shows that jobs start from 15 of manufacturing in 1960 to 1980 rises and then it decreases from 1980 to 2000 and then gradually gropdown from 2000 to 2020 and if second line of retail shows in graph it start from 6 in 1960 to 2020 it gradually increases from 1960 to 1980 and then rapidally increases from 1980 to to 2020
On the other hand, the line of agriculture in the graphs shows that, it start from number 6 from 1960 to 1980 it decreases and from 1980 to 2000 it remain same and then from 2000 to 2020 it decreases and the other line of healthcare starts from 3 it start from 1960 to 1980 increases and from 1980 to 2020 increases in continuous way
Since. all the line graph shows jobs in million x axis and the years shows in y axis
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The student attempts to address the task by reporting on the four sectors shown in the line graph between 1960 and 2020. However, the response contains significant data inaccuracies and confusion regarding the time period (mentioning 1920 instead of 1960 in the introduction). While the main trends are partially identified, such as the rise in retail and healthcare and the fluctuations in manufacturing and agriculture, the lack of precise figures and the unstructured presentation mean that key features are not clearly highlighted or compared. The overview is weak and fails to present a clear picture of overall trends, resulting in a performance that meets the criteria for Band 4.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text suffers from severe organizational and cohesive issues. The response is constructed with very long, run-on sentences connected by repetitive conjunctions like 'and then', which creates a breathless and confusing read. Paragraphing is attempted with an introduction and two body paragraphs, but the internal logic and progression within these paragraphs are faulty. Referencing is frequently unclear, and cohesive devices are used inadequately or repetitively. Overall, the flow of information is severely disrupted, aligning with the descriptors for Band 4.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic, repetitive, and heavily relies on words from the prompt and simple terms like 'rise', 'decrease', and 'increase'. There are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'gropdown' instead of 'drop down' or 'decrease', and 'rapidally' instead of 'rapidly'. The range of vocabulary is limited and inadequate for a precise academic summary. While the reader can generally deduce the intended meaning, the frequent errors and restricted lexical range place this response firmly at Band 4.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
Grammatical control is weak throughout the response. The text consists almost entirely of lengthy, poorly structured compound sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions without proper punctuation. There is a near-total absence of accurate complex sentence structures. Frequent errors in tense consistency, prepositions, and sentence boundaries—such as 'jobs start from 15 of manufacturing in 1960 to 1980 rises'—frequently strain the reader and obscure meaning. This level of grammatical accuracy and range corresponds to a Band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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