Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The given line graph tracks the information about the figures of job in four distinct sectors of the economy in the United States, namely; manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare from 1960 to 2020.
As an overview, in first the jobs in manufacturing sector was the highest, while least in the healthcare. Moreover, by the time the employment in retail and agriculture inclined and in manufacturing and healthcare it reduced.
In detail, in 1960, there are 15 million jobs in manufacturing sector which was almost 9 million more than retail and agriculture. However, in 1980, the jobs in manufacturing and retail was escalated by 5 million. In addition, between 1980 and 2020 the jobs in manufacturing sector declined gradually, while almost 6 million jobs are increased in retail sector.
Furthermore, the jobs in agriculture and healthcare sector in 1960 was 6 million and 2.5 million respectively. Additionally, there was addition in healthcare by 2.5 million which further grew significantly to 16 million in 2020. Apart from this, the jobs in agriculture sector becomes the lowest in 1980 to 2.5 million. Afterwards, from 1980 to 2020 it witnessed a modest decline to almost 2 million.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The student covers all parts of the task by identifying and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is attempted, and key data points such as the initial high point of manufacturing and the growth in healthcare are mentioned. However, the overview is slightly mechanical and contains expression errors ("in first the jobs in manufacturing sector was the highest"). While the response selects and compares relevant data, some figures lack precision, and the overall development of data relationships falls short of a Band 7 descriptor, aligning more closely with Band 6.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The response is arranged into four paragraphs, providing a logical separation of introduction, overview, and body details. Cohesive devices are used to sequence information, such as "In detail," "Furthermore," and "Apart from this." However, referencing and progression are occasionally faulty, and transitions feel mechanical at times. For instance, "in first the jobs..." disrupts the natural flow of the overview. Paragraphing is utilised adequately, but paragraph boundaries and internal cohesive links prevent the text from achieving a higher band.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to economic sectors and trends, such as "manufacturing," "retail," "agriculture," "healthcare," "declined gradually," and "modest decline." However, there are noticeable word-choice and collocation inaccuracies, such as "tracks the information about the figures of job," "the jobs in manufacturing and retail was escalated," and "there was addition in healthcare." These errors show an attempt at less common vocabulary with mixed success, placing the vocabulary score firmly at Band 6.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The writing demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as relative clauses and subordinate structures ("which was almost 9 million more than retail and agriculture"). However, there are several grammatical errors and awkward agreements throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ("the jobs in manufacturing sector was the highest", "there are 15 million jobs") and tense inconsistencies ("the jobs in agriculture sector becomes the lowest"). Despite these errors, communication is rarely impeded, warranting a Band 6.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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