Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The line graph illustrates the changes in employment figures acrossfour economic sectors in the United States Manufacturing, Retail, Healthcare, and Agriculture from 1960 to 2020, measured in millions o2f jobs.
Overall, Healthcare and Retail experienced consistent upward trajectories throughout the 60-years period , with Healthcare exhibiting the most dramatic rise. Conversly, Manufacturing saw initial growth before experiencing a steady decline, while Agriculture remained the smallest employer with a slight downward drift.
In 1960, Manufacturing was by far the largest provider of the jobes at 15 million, peaking at 20 million in 1980.However, this second sector subsequently contracted, dropping to 17 million in 2000 and eventually falling to 13 million by 2020. In contrast, Retail started at 6 million in1960 and climed steadily over the decades, overtaking Manufacturing around 2015 to reached 16 million by the end of the timeframe.
Healthcare begins as the smallest sectorin 1960 alongside Agriculture, offering only 2 million jobs in 1960. Over the following six decades , Healthcare witnessed substantial and uninterrupted expension, matching Manufacturing at approximately 14 million jobs in 2015and concluding at 16 million in 2020. Conversly, Agriculture started at 6 million jobs in 1960, dipped sharply to 3 million in 1980, and then slowly diminished to finish at just under 2 million in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response effectively covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features, trends, and comparisons across the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. You provided a clear overview at the beginning, noting the upward trajectories of Healthcare and Retail compared to the decline in Manufacturing and Agriculture. Specific data points, such as Manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and Retail reaching 16 million by 2020, are accurately cited and used to support your comparisons. All requirements of Task 1 are met proficiently, resulting in a strong band score.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
Your essay is logically organized and follows a clear progression from an introduction and overview to detailed body paragraphs. Paragraphing is used appropriately, with each body paragraph focusing on specific sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'Conversly', 'However', and 'In contrast' are employed to guide the reader through the data, although there is a slight typo in 'Conversly'. Overall, referencing and transitions work effectively to ensure the information flows smoothly from one idea to the next.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
You demonstrated a sufficient and flexible range of vocabulary suited to a task reporting economic trends, using terms like 'upward trajectories', 'contracted', 'uninterrupted expansion', and 'diminished'. There are some minor typographical and spelling errors, such as 'acrossfour', 'jobes', 'climed', and 'expension', alongside a couple of tense slips like 'Healthcare begins'. However, these vocabulary choices and minor slips do not impede communication, and you successfully attempted less common lexical items.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response features a good mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating control over time clauses and contrast structures (e.g., 'while Agriculture remained the smallest employer with a slight downward drift'). There are a few grammatical and mechanical inaccuracies, such as the missing space in 'acrossfour', a stray number in 'millions o2f jobs', and some minor punctuation slip-ups like the spacing around commas. Despite these minor issues, the majority of sentences are clear and accurate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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