Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The given line graph illustrates data on the number of jobs in four divisions (manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) of the economy in the US over 6 decades.
Overall, from the provided information manufacturing sector initially experienced sudden rise and droped significantly. Meanwhile retail and healthcare remained first with a significant rise over the period.
The employment in manufacturing department from the year 1960 to 1980 increased steadily to 20 million and decreased to around 12 by 2020. Whereas agriculture sector remained the lowest with a gradual drop from 6 million to approximately 3 million with a stable figure from 1980 to 2020.
Furthermore, jobs in retail sector increased significantly over the period from 6 million to around 16 million. Lastly, the employment in healthcare sector also remained first with a sudden raise from over 3 million to 16 million with a sudden increase between 1980 to 2000 which is approximately 15%.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response covers all four economic sectors shown in the graph (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare) and attempts to report the main features and trends. An overview is provided, though it contains some inaccuracies, such as stating that retail and healthcare 'remained first' in 1960 when the graph indicates otherwise. Key data points are cited, such as manufacturing rising to 20 million and dropping to 12 million by 2020. However, some figures lack precision, and the conclusion regarding healthcare mentioning 'approximately 15%' is mathematically unclear and confusing in context. Overall, the task is addressed, but the development and accuracy of data reporting fall into the Band 6 category.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is structured into logical paragraphs: an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs detailing the specific sectors. Cohesive devices are used to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Overall', 'Meanwhile', 'Whereas', and 'Furthermore'. However, referencing and transitions are at times slightly mechanical or confusing, such as the sudden jump in the overview without clear chronological grounding. Paragraphing is used sufficiently to separate the introduction, overview, and body details, resulting in a coherent overall arrangement that meets the requirements for Band 6.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student uses an adequate vocabulary range appropriate for Task 1, incorporating terms like 'manufacturing', 'agriculture', 'employment', 'gradual drop', and 'fluctuate'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors and awkward word choices, such as 'sudden rise and droped significantly' (with a spelling error in 'dropped') and 'manufacturing department' instead of 'sector'. Phrases like 'remained first' are used inaccurately to describe starting points. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main ideas, these frequent word-choice and spelling errors limit the score to a Band 5.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The response includes a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as 'The employment in manufacturing department from the year 1960 to 1980 increased steadily...' and 'Furthermore, jobs in retail sector increased significantly...'. There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings, including missing articles ('in retail sector', 'in healthcare sector'), spelling mistakes ('droped'), and tense/preposition awkwardness. Complex structures are attempted but sometimes result in ungrammatical or confusing clauses, such as the modifier at the end of the final sentence ('which is approximately 15%'). These errors occasionally create strain, placing the grammar at a Band 5.5.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.