Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The line graph illustrates the different jobs in four different areas of economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.

Firstly, the manufacturing sector was at 15 million in 1960, as the time passes it shows a remarkable increase upto 20 millions. between 1980 to 2020 this job area goes down in trend and reach at 13 million at the end of 2020.

secondly, the retail, agriculture and healthcare sectors was at low cost than first one. In 1960 these three were at the botton ranges from 3 to 7 million but the jobs in retails goes drastically upward and hit nearly 16 millions. the healthcare work also rises and reach almost 16 millions. The only department which goes down was agriculture and it hits only 3 millions cost of jobs in 2020.

overall, manufacturing category was at top while remaining three categories was at low cost in early 1960. manufacturing and agriculture shows overall decrease in cost from start to end, while the retail and health care prices follows upward trend.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The student attempts to address the prompt by reporting on the number of jobs across four sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key features, such as the peak and decline of manufacturing, the rise in retail and healthcare, and the fall in agriculture, are mentioned. However, the task achievement is hindered by inaccuracies in reporting the data and a major misuse of economic terminology, specifically referring to the number of jobs as 'cost' throughout the response (e.g., 'agriculture and healthcare sectors was at low cost', 'hits only 3 millions cost of jobs'). This demonstrates a fundamental misunderstanding of the graph's labels. Consequently, while the main trends are identified, the overall response lacks the precision required for higher bands.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The text is organized into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs for sectoral details, and a conclusion. However, progression is frequently disrupted by awkward sequencing and mechanical linking words like 'Firstly', 'secondly', and 'overall', which are also punctuated incorrectly with lowercase letters at the beginning of sentences. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the lack of a proper overview paragraph that effectively summarises the main trends further limits coherence. Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion within paragraphs feels disjointed due to abrupt transitions between different sectors.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The lexical range is limited and frequently inappropriate. The most severe lexical error is the repeated confusion between employment numbers and financial cost, using the word 'cost' to describe the number of jobs in millions. Other basic vocabulary items are used repetitively, and attempts at less common vocabulary lead to awkward collocations or incorrect word choices, such as 'at the botton ranges' and 'healthcare work'. Spelling mistakes (e.g., 'upto', 'botton') and lack of control over word formation keep this criterion firmly at the band 5 level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'manufacturing sector was', 'four sectors ... was', 'remaining three categories was'), capitalization errors (e.g., 'secondly', 'overall'), and tense consistency. Punctuation is neglected at the start of sentences and with proper capitalization. While some simple sentences are communicated clearly, the frequency of grammatical errors causes difficulty for the reader and prevents the response from achieving a higher band.

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