Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

the bhar graph illustrate give data the number of job in four sector of the economy in the us among 1960 and 2020.

overall view that figre of job in four sector of the economy in the us,1960,2020. in 1960 manufacturing job of the 15million however 1980 rise to this job 20million. however 2000 in decrease 20million to 14millons and 2020 only made up very few only 12millons.relail very little jobs in 1960 5million later 1980 hig rise job of 10million. and 2000 very hig ups job 10 million to 15 millions .but 2020 1% up retail job .agriculture minimal jobs in 1960 5 millions.further hig reduce in 1980 and 2000 only 3million last healthcare job 1960 5millons. but in 1980 uo to total 10million. in addition rise to in 2000

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5

The response attempts to summarize the data by covering most of the four economic sectors across the given years (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare). However, the length requirement has NOT been met, as the text contains only 131 words, falling short of the 150-word minimum. This results in under-developed ideas and an incomplete overview. While the candidate tries to report main features and comparisons, the lack of a proper overview paragraph and the restricted volume prevent the response from scoring higher. Based on these descriptors, this part of the writing aligns with a band score of 4.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The text lacks proper paragraphing, being presented as a single disorganized block of sentences with almost no capitalization or punctuation control. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused (e.g., repetitive use of 'however' and 'and'). There is no clear overall progression of ideas, making the data difficult to follow. References to years and trends are jumbled together without logical sequencing. These features correspond to a band score of 4.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The student uses a very limited and repetitive range of vocabulary, such as 'job', 'sector', 'rise', and 'reduce'. There are numerous spelling errors ('bhar' for bar, 'relail' for retail, 'hig' for high, 'uo' for up) and awkward word choices. While the basic topic can be understood, the restricted vocabulary and persistent errors cause strain for the reader, fitting the band 4.0 descriptor.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 3.5

Grammatical control is extremely weak throughout the response. There is a complete absence of standard sentence structure, punctuation, and capitalization. Most sentences are fragmented or ungrammatical (e.g., 'in 1960 manufacturing job of the 15million however 1980 rise to this job 20million'). Errors are very frequent and constantly distort meaning, aligning closely with a band score of 3.5.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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