Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-14

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph tracks the

changes about the total workforce in four distinct employment sectors in the United

States economy between 1960 and 2020.

Overall, manufacturing

was the most popular option for employment by 1998 but later declined in 2020,

while healthcare represented the lowest number of jobs. Retail and agricultural

sector employed more number of workers by the end of 2020. Retail recives

In 1960, initially manufacturing

accounted for 15 million jobs, sharply peaked at 20 million in 1920 across all

the four employment sectors. However, this figures subsequently drop,

approximately 17 million in 2000 and declined further to 14 million in 2020.

Regarding retail and healthcare workforce, both sectors constituted less number of jobs in 1960, 6 million and 2 million respectively. Their employment rate gradually recorded a considerable rise at round 10 million for retail and 5 million for healthcare in 1980. They also saw further noticeable job count in 2000, healthcare experienced a dramatic inclined to 11 million before reaching around 16 million in 2020. Retail also saw modest rise, comprises 15 million in 2000 to 16 million in 2020. By contrast, agricultural employment dropped from 6 million to 3 million in 1980, remained relatively constant untill 2020, followed by further slightly decline and stood at 2 million in 2020

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The student covers all parts of the task by reporting the main trends and making relevant comparisons across the four employment sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided in the second paragraph, outlining general trends such as manufacturing being the most popular option initially before declining, and healthcare representing the lowest number of jobs initially. Key data points are selected to support the description, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million and healthcare reaching around 16 million in 2020. However, there are some minor factual inaccuracies or awkward data reporting, such as referencing the year 1920 instead of 1960, and an incomplete sentence at the end of the second paragraph ('Retail recives'). Despite these minor issues, the overall response successfully fulfills the requirements of Task 1.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is organized into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview, a body paragraph on manufacturing, and a final body paragraph detailing retail, healthcare, and agricultural sectors. Cohesive devices are used to link ideas, such as 'Overall', 'However', 'Regarding', and 'By contrast'. However, referencing and paragraph flow are occasionally hindered by mechanical or faulty transitions, and the abrupt sentence ending ('Retail recives') disrupts the cohesion. Paragraphing is generally sufficient and appropriate, ensuring a coherent overall arrangement even if the progression stumbles slightly in places.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to economic sectors and trends, such as 'workforce', 'employment sectors', 'gradually recorded a considerable rise', and 'relatively constant'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation errors, including 'tracks the changes about', 'popular option for employment', 'sharply peaked', and 'dramatic inclined' instead of 'dramatic inclination' or 'dramatically inclined'. Spelling or form issues are also present, such as 'recives' and 'untill'. These errors do not impede overall communication, but they restrict the lexical score to a solid Band 6.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer employs a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses, prepositional phrases, and subordinate clauses (e.g., 'while healthcare represented the lowest number of jobs' and 'before reaching around 16 million in 2020'). However, frequent grammatical errors are present throughout the text, such as tense inconsistencies ('this figures subsequently drop', 'comprises' instead of 'comprising'), missing articles or incorrect pluralization ('less number of jobs', 'slightly decline'), and sentence fragments or incomplete structures. While these errors rarely completely impede communication, they lower the accuracy and overall grammatical range below a Band 7.

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