Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-15
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Bilkul, aapne bilkul theek pakda! Jab isko actual count kiya gaya toh yeh 261 words ban raha tha (pehle galat andaza lag gaya tha). IELTS Task 1 ke liye 261 words thode zyada hain, is se time waste ho sakta hai aur ghaltiyon ke chances barh jate hain. Ideal word count 160 se 180 words ke darmiyan hona chahiye.
Chalein, isko condense kar ke bilkul [redacted phone] words ka ekdam sharp, high-scoring aur crisp version banate hain jismein koi extra fluff nahi hoga:
Condensed Version (Approx. 165 Words)
The provided line graph illustrates the number of jobs across four sectors in the US economy between 1960 and 2020.
Overall, the services sector experienced a dramatic upward trend, becoming the dominant employer by the end of the period, whereas manufacturing followed a contrasting pattern of decline.
In 1960, manufacturing led with roughly 20 million jobs, significantly outstripping services. Over the subsequent decades, however, services surged steadily, peaking at over 70 million jobs by 2020. Conversely, manufacturing exhibited a persistent downward trajectory.
Regarding the remaining sectors, agriculture started low at under 5 million and remained relatively flat, finishing at a negligible figure. Meanwhile, the professional sector showed moderate, steady growth throughout the sixty-year timeframe.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student includes conversational meta-commentary in Urdu/Hindi at the beginning before presenting the actual report. While the core report successfully covers the main trends in the provided line graph, it contains some notable inaccuracies regarding the visual data. For instance, the text states that manufacturing 'led with roughly 20 million jobs' in 1960, whereas the data shows it at 15 million. Furthermore, it peaks manufacturing/services at 'over 70 million jobs by 2020', which grossly misinterprets the y-axis scaling (which tops out at 25 million). Despite a clear overview and attempt to summarize key features, these factual discrepancies and inclusion of conversational text limit the task achievement.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The report itself is logically structured with clear paragraphing, moving from an introduction to an overall trend summary, followed by body paragraphs detailing specific sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', 'Over the subsequent decades', and 'Conversely' are used appropriately to guide the reader through the data. However, the inclusion of the conversational meta-text at the top creates a disjointed organizational flow. Within the report body, referencing and transitions are generally clear and effective.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range suitable for describing trends and graphical data, utilizing lexical items such as 'dramatic upward trend', 'dominant employer', 'persistent downward trajectory', and 'moderate, steady growth'. However, there are occasional awkward collocations and the misuse of lexical items when applied to the faulty data (e.g., claiming employment reached '70 million'). Overall, the vocabulary attempts are ambitious and generally functional, though hindered by the data interpretation errors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The grammatical structures employed within the report are varied, incorporating a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, subordinate clauses, and participial phrases (e.g., 'becoming the dominant employer by the end of the period'). Control over grammar is reasonably good within the English portion of the text, with only a few minor errors. Punctuation is handled well, and the sentence structures facilitate smooth reading, even though the data being reported contains significant misreadings.
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