Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line chart provides data about the numerous jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, it is quite evident that health care sector surge throughout the time periods. However, agriculture sector sharply decreased throughout the years in US.
At the fitting glance, manufacturing was significantly increased in 1960 15 millions jobs to 20 millions. While, agriculture sector jobs was least 5 million to 2.5 million fall in 1960 to 1980. Moreover, retail sector slightly increased by 5 million jobs in 1980. Also, health care sector risen 2 millions to 5 millions in 1980 in US.
Another detailing revealed that retail sector and health care sector were risen steady throughout the period 5 millions to 16 millions and 2 millions to 16 millions respectively. In sharp contrast, agriculture sector economic was gradually decreased over the time period 5 millions to 2 millions in US jobs. Additionally, manufacturing sector economic sharply decreased after the year 1
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student covers the main trends in the four sectors over the given period, providing an overview and specific data points (e.g., mentioning that retail and healthcare increased while agriculture and manufacturing experienced declines or fluctuations). However, the response contains several data inaccuracies and awkward expressions, such as stating that manufacturing increased from '15 millions jobs to 20 millions' in 1960 (when 15 million was the 1960 figure itself) and getting cut off at the end of the text. Furthermore, the selection of features could be structured more logically. Because of these inaccuracies, underdeveloped comparisons, and incomplete final sentences, the task achievement is limited to a Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response attempts paragraphing, dividing the introduction, overview, and body details into separate blocks. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by fragmented sentences and awkward transitional phrases like 'At the fitting glance' and 'Another detailing revealed'. Cohesive devices are either misused or applied mechanically. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the text ends abruptly in the middle of a sentence, leading to a breakdown in coherence towards the end. Overall organization meets the requirements of a Band 5.0, where an overall arrangement is attempted but cohesion is often faulty and mechanical.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to communicate basic trends, using terms such as 'sector', 'economy', 'increased', and 'decreased'. However, the range is limited and repetitive, and there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'health care sector surge', 'manufacturing sector economic', and 'risen steady'. These lexical inaccuracies, combined with awkward phrasing like 'At the fitting glance' and 'Another detailing revealed', restrict the lexical score to a Band 5.0, as the vocabulary is minimally adequate for the task but contains errors that occasionally cause difficulty.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but many attempts at complexity result in grammatical errors. Examples include missing prepositions, incorrect verb forms ('health care sector surge', 'manufacturing was significantly increased in 1960 15 millions jobs', 'retail sector and health care sector were risen steady'), and subject-verb agreement issues. Punctuation is also problematic, and the sentence structure breaks down entirely at the end of the response ('manufacturing sector economic sharply decreased after the year 1'). Frequent grammatical errors cause some difficulty for the reader, aligning with Band 5.0 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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