Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates about the jobs in four sectors in the US economy from 1960 to 2020 in millions.
Manufacturing and agriculture faced the declined in number of jobs by 2020 while in the begining of the tenure jobs in mnfucaturing rose by 5 million in 1980 but agriculture faced the declined over the time till the end by 20020.
On the other hand, retail and healthcare starts from minimum but got sharply increased in jobs by 2020 and rose togetherly because by the time we can see that these both sectors got increased by jobs decades to decades while manufacturing faced drop down after 1980 and then never raised again and same as for agriculture by the end of 2020 number of jobs comes to 13 milion for manufacturing from 15 million in 1990 and fr healthcare it came from 6 million to 2 million had a daramatic decline in this sectore but for retail and health care the situation is totally opposite as it comes to 15 million in both departs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main trends in the four sectors, noting the overall decline in manufacturing and agriculture, and the growth in retail and healthcare. However, the task achievement is hindered by several factual inaccuracies and confusion regarding the data. For instance, the student states that manufacturing jobs dropped to 13 million from 15 million in 1990 (whereas the start was 1960 at 15 million) and confuses healthcare and agriculture data towards the end of the text. Furthermore, the overview lacks clarity due to these tangled descriptions. While the main features are touched upon, the lack of precision in reporting the figures prevents the response from achieving a higher band score, placing it firmly at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The text is structured into three paragraphs, including an introduction and two body blocks, but the internal organisation and progression of ideas are weak. Sentences are often run-on and lack appropriate punctuation, making the logical flow difficult to follow. Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or repetitively, such as 'On the other hand' and 'and same as for'. There is a lack of clear referencing between sentences, and the paragraphing does not adequately separate distinct trends or comparisons, resulting in a confusing jumble of information that frequently requires the reader to re-read to grasp the intended meaning.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student demonstrates a limited range of vocabulary with several noticeable errors in word choice and spelling, such as 'mnfucaturing', 'daramatic', 'depart', and 'togetherly'. Phrasing tends to be repetitive and imprecise, using basic verbs like 'faced' and 'got increased' rather than more sophisticated alternatives suited for describing graphical data. While the vocabulary is minimally adequate to convey the general subject matter, frequent lexical errors and awkward collocations cause some difficulty for the reader and prevent the response from reaching a higher band level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The grammatical range is quite limited, consisting mostly of overly long, complex sentences that lack proper punctuation and coordination. There are frequent errors in verb tense, agreement, and prepositions, such as 'starts from minimum', 'never raised again', and 'jobs comes to'. These errors occur throughout the response and frequently impede communication by blurring the relationships between clauses and ideas. While there are a few simple structures that are handled adequately, the high frequency of grammatical slips keeps the response at a Band 5.0 level.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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