Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The given line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four various sectors of the U.S. from 1960 to 2020.

Overall, agriculture and retail showed an upward trend, whereas manufacturing and healthcare leads to the downward trend throughout the given time period.

In 1960, manufacturing holds the largest number of jobs about 15 millions, while healthcare stood at the lowest number of jobs at less than 5 millions and retail and agriculture interestingly had the same number of jobs around more than 5 millions. Manufacturing, retail, and healthcare sectors grew significantly after 2 decades and stood at 20 million, 10 million, and 5 million jobs.

In the case of the year 2000, manufacturing declined gradually and reached at more than 15 million jobs, and agriculture remained stable, moreover healthcare and retail rose steadily and accounted for more than 10 million, and 15 million jobs. After twenty years, Healthcare and retail peaked at more than 15 million jobs, whilst agriculture fell to its lowest level at less than 5 million, additionally, manufacturing also faced a downward trend and reached at less than 15 million jobs.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response attempts to cover the main features of the line graph, but there are noticeable factual errors in interpreting the trends and data. For instance, the student states that 'agriculture and retail showed an upward trend, whereas manufacturing and healthcare leads to the downward trend', which is factually incorrect regarding healthcare (as healthcare rose significantly from 2 million in 1960 to 16 million in 2020). Similarly, manufacturing is described as declining in 2000, whereas it actually peaked in 1980 at 20 million before declining. The overview fails to accurately summarise the overall picture of all four sectors. Furthermore, some data points are imprecise or misstated (e.g., '15 millions', '5 million jobs' for retail in 1980 when it was 10 million). These inaccuracies pull the task achievement score down.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is organised into four paragraphs: an introduction, an overview, and two body paragraphs detailing specific years. There is a basic structure with some cohesive devices used, such as 'Overall', 'In 1960', 'In the case of the year 2000', and 'After twenty years'. However, progression is sometimes awkward, and referencing or linking is mechanical (e.g., stringing clauses together with commas like 'agriculture remained stable, moreover healthcare and retail rose steadily'). Paragraphing is present, but the internal logical flow within paragraphs is hindered by run-on sentences and imprecise transitions, placing it firmly in the band 6 category.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task, with appropriate topic-specific terms such as 'sector', 'trend', 'gradually', 'stable', and 'peaked'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies and awkward phrasing, such as 'manufacturing holds the largest number of jobs about 15 millions' and 'healthcare leads to the downward trend'. The student attempts less common vocabulary ('fluctuated', 'significantly', 'steadily'), but collocation and word choice errors ('leads to the downward trend', 'stood at 5 million jobs' when referring to 1980 retail) prevent the response from achieving a higher score. Spelling is generally accurate, but singular/plural confusions ('15 millions') detract from precision.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, such as compound sentences joined by coordinating conjunctions ('while', 'whereas', 'and'). However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are several errors in verb tense and agreement, notably 'manufacturing ... leads to the downward trend' (tense shift/disagreement) and 'manufacturing holds ... about 15 millions' (unnecessary plural). Additionally, run-on sentences with comma splices frequently occur, such as 'agriculture remained stable, moreover healthcare and retail rose steadily'. Despite these errors, communication is not severely impeded, supporting a band 5.5 performance.

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