Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph shows number of jobs in four sectors of economy which are manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare. During the year between 1960 and 1980 the manufacturing jobs increases rapidly from 15 million to 20 million and then declining agin to 12 million in 2020. The reatil industry is growing from 5 million to 15 million jobs in the following year. The agriculture jobs are decining under 5 million in the given years . The healthcare industry is growing fast day by day and producing more jobs in the last years. in comparison to all the four sectors in the graph, the healthcare industry is producing more jobs as compared to retail industry and manufacturing industry is producing more jobs as compared to agriculture sector so in short the healthcare sector provides more emplyoment in US between 1960 and 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, identifying the four sectors and describing some general trends, such as manufacturing rising and then declining, and retail increasing over time. However, there are notable omissions and inaccuracies in reading the data; for instance, the writer states manufacturing declined to 12 million in 2020 (when it was around 13 million) and claims retail grew from 5 million in the 'following year', which is confusing. Furthermore, the final summary is slightly contradictory and lacks precise referencing. Crucially, the response falls below the mandatory 150-word minimum, containing only 140 words, which incurs a penalty under Task Achievement. Consequently, the task is only partially addressed.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay lacks proper paragraphing, presented as one single block of text, which significantly hinders readability and the overall organization of ideas. While there is a basic attempt to sequence information chronologically and make comparisons at the end, cohesive devices are very basic and sometimes repetitive or misused (e.g., 'in comparison to all the four sectors...', 'so in short'). Referencing is also occasionally unclear. Although the progression of ideas can be followed with some effort, the absence of paragraph structure and mechanical cohesion place this response firmly in Band 5 for Coherence and Cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The lexical resource used is adequate for basic communication but limited in range. The student successfully incorporates domain-specific vocabulary such as 'manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare', as well as terms like 'industry' and 'employment'. However, there are several spelling errors ('agin' for again, 'reatil' for retail, 'decining' for declining, 'emplyoment' for employment) and awkward collocations ('growing fast day by day'). The vocabulary lacks the flexibility and precision required for higher bands, though it remains minimally adequate to convey the basic trends.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'During the year between 1960 and 1980 the manufacturing jobs increases rapidly...'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak throughout the text. There are notable errors in subject-verb agreement ('jobs increases', 'jobs are decining'), tense consistency (shifting between past and present without clear reason), and missing articles ('shows number of jobs', 'in US'). Punctuation is also neglected, particularly with run-on phrasing and missing commas after introductory time clauses. These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader, aligning with the Band 5 descriptor.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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