Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates figures of job in four different sector of United state economy between time period of 1960 to 2020.
Firstly, manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs in year 1960,with 15 millions. which was increased to 20 million in 1980.However,the figure droped to containly ,at the low of 13 million in year 2020.Futhermore,agriculture sector accounted for 6 million jobs in year 1960. While, it droped at the half of initial figure ,from 6to 3 million in year 1980.Where in following year ,it remain unchange and than, number of jobs droped slighty at 2 million in 2020.
secondly, retail secotor registered 6 million jobs in 1960 then it jumped to 15 million in year 2000. Nevertheless, figure of jobs rised to 16million in 2020.On the other hand, healthcare captured 3 million jobs in year 1960 ,which rollup to same of retail sector ,at 16 million in year 2020
In summary, both Manufacturing and agriculture sector had faced sugred in intial number of jobs.While, other to two sector, retail and healthcare were increased dramatically
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response covers all four sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare) and reports key trends across the period from 1960 to 2020. The student successfully identifies major figures, such as manufacturing peaking at 20 million in 1980 and retail reaching 16 million by 2020. However, there are some inaccurate data points and minor misreadings; for example, the student states that healthcare started at 3 million in 1960 when the graph indicates 2 million, and the summary section contains confusing inaccuracies regarding which sectors grew or fell. Despite these flaws, an overview is attempted at the end, and the main features are generally reported, placing this securely at Band 5.5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, which helps give it an overall structure. However, the flow of information is frequently disrupted by mechanical and awkward transitions, such as 'Firstly,' 'Futhermore,' 'secondly,' and 'In summary, both Manufacturing and agriculture sector had faced sugred...'. Cohesive devices are often used inaccurately or clumsily. Pronoun referencing and linking between sentences lack smoothness, making the progression of ideas feel disjointed at times. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion is weak. These features align with Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively basic and repetitive, with frequent word-choice and spelling errors such as 'sector' spelled as 'secotor', 'droped', 'containly', 'rised', 'sugred', and 'intial'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary items like 'accounted for', 'captured', and 'dramatically', but these are often undermined by inaccurate collocation or incorrect forms (e.g., 'figures of job in four different sector'). While the meaning is generally decipherable, the lexical control is limited and errors cause some distraction for the reader, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar and punctuation is weak. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement, tense consistency, and prepositions, such as 'manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs in year 1960,with 15 millions. which was increased', 'it droped at the half', and 'other to two sector'. Punctuation is also problematic, with incorrect comma splices and stray spacing. Because attempts at complex structures are frequently faulty and errors are persistent throughout the text, a score of 5.0 is appropriate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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