Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-16

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

IELTS

WRITING TASK 1 (CAMB 21) PART 1

The line graph illustrates the Number of jobs available in the U.S. Economy in four different Sectors (Manufacturing, Retail, Agriculture, Health (Care). Between 1960 and 2020. Units are measured in Millions.

Overall, Manufacturing Sector leads the chart with highest Numbers while Agriculture Sector offered least opportunities for U.S. people.

In Contrast to, Manufacturing Sector saw rapid increase from in Numbers from 1960 to 1980 (20 million respectively) then, dropped down to nearly 16 million in 2000 before reaching up to its lowest in 2020. Although, Retail Sector also depicts moderate change in its initial years then grew rapidly till 2000 and remains steady in its final years.

On the other hand, Agriculture Sector decline slowly till 1980 and remain steady for next 20 years before dipping towards its lowest point in 2020 (2 million respectively) whereas, Health Care rise gradually from 1960 to 1980 before showing its considerable change heading towards its final years of more than 15 million.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The student covers all four economic sectors shown in the line graph and successfully identifies key trends and comparisons, such as manufacturing peaking in 1980 and agriculture declining. However, there are a few inaccuracies in reporting specific data points, such as stating that manufacturing reached '20 million respectively' in 1980 (it was 20 million, but the use of 'respectively' is misused here as there is only one variable being discussed) and claiming manufacturing reached its lowest in 2020 when agriculture actually recorded the lowest absolute figures overall. The overview is somewhat weak, as manufacturing did not maintain the highest numbers throughout the entire period (retail and healthcare overtook it by 2020). Despite these minor lapses, the main features are highlighted and the task is adequately addressed overall, corresponding to a Band 6.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response is arranged into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs detailing specific trends. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as 'In Contrast to', 'then', 'Although', and 'On the other hand'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical. For instance, the phrase 'In Contrast to, Manufacturing Sector saw...' is grammatically awkward and disrupts the flow. Additionally, paragraphing is slightly unconventional, as the introduction is split and fragmented by sentence boundaries that do not connect fluidly. Overall logical organisation is present, but progression is occasionally hindered by imprecise linking words and punctuation errors, placing this criterion at Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting less common items related to data reporting such as 'rapid increase', 'moderate change', and 'decline slowly'. However, there are notable word choice and collocation inaccuracies throughout the text, including capitalisation errors like 'Sectors' and 'Health (Care)', and misuse of terms such as 'respectively' when referring to a single data point in '20 million respectively'. The phrase 'heading towards its final years' is slightly unnatural in this context. While communication is not impeded and the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the main trends, the presence of frequent lexical slips limits the score to a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, incorporating subordinate clauses using 'although' and 'whereas'. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in punctuation and sentence structure, such as the sentence fragment 'Between 1960 and 2020. Units are measured in Millions.' and the erroneous comma splice in 'rapid increase from in Numbers from 1960 to 1980... then, dropped down'. Preposition use is also flawed ('increase from in Numbers'). Complex structures tend to be faulty, and while simple sentences are generally clear, the accumulation of structural and punctuation errors places this performance firmly at Band 5.5.

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