Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
Today we will talk about number of jobs in four sectors of economy in the US between 1960 to 2020.We will get this information from chart below. In 1960 there are 2 million jobs in Healthcare field,There are 6 million jobs in agriculture field,6 million in retail field and 15 million jobs in manufacturing field. In 1980 there are 3 million jobs in agriculture field,5 million jobs in Healthcare field,10 million jobs in retail field and 20 million jobs in manufacturing field.In 2000 there are 3 million jobs in agriculture field,there are 11 million jobs in Healthcare field, there are 15 million jobs in retail fild and there are 17 million jobs in manufacturing field. In 2020 there are 2 million jobs in agriculture field, there are 16 million job in Healthcare field, also there are 16 million jobs in retail field and there are 13 million jobs in manufacturing field.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.5
The response attempts to report information from the chart regarding job numbers across four economic sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020. However, the student fails to meet the fundamental requirements of an Academic Task 1 response. There is no introductory overview presenting the main trends, such as the overall growth in healthcare and retail versus the decline in agriculture. Instead, the writer lists data chronologically and mechanically year by year, repeating formulaic structures (e.g., In 1960 there are... In 1980 there are...). Furthermore, there is no comparison made between the sectors. Because the data is presented as a raw list without synthesis, trends, or overviews, the task is only partially addressed, earning a band 4.5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text suffers from significant organizational flaws. The entire response is written as a single block paragraph without any paragraph breaks to separate the introduction, body data, or overview. Progression is entirely absent because the information is thrown together as a series of disconnected point-by-point data entries rather than logically structured groupings. Cohesive devices are minimal and repetitive, relying exclusively on basic time markers like 'In 1960', 'In 1980', 'In 2000', and 'In 2020'. There is no effective referencing or substitution, leading to a mechanical and monotonous reading experience. This aligns closely with the Band 4.0 descriptor.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used throughout the essay is extremely basic, highly repetitive, and restricted to everyday terms. The student repeatedly uses elementary words and phrases like 'number of jobs', 'fields' (instead of sectors), and 'there are'. There is a lack of flexibility, and spelling errors are present, such as 'fild' instead of 'field'. The response does not demonstrate the ability to use less common lexical items or paraphrase the prompt effectively. Because the vocabulary is very limited and repetitive, constraining communication to simple listings, it fits the Band 4.0 level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The grammatical range is severely restricted. The student relies entirely on simple sentences structured with 'There is/are', failing to incorporate complex structures. Furthermore, tense control is inconsistent and inappropriate for describing historical data; the student uses the present tense ('there are 2 million jobs') to describe past years from 1960 onwards, rather than the past tense. Punctuation errors are also notable, including missing spaces after periods and commas. Because the sentence structures are extremely basic and recurring errors impede grammatical appropriateness, the response warrants a band 4.0.
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