Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph provides information about the number of jobs measured in millions in different sectors of the US economy (manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare) from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, the manufacturing sector had the highest number of jobs and reached the peak at the beginning in 1960 after that declined over the period of time.Retail and healthcare experienced considerable growth. In contrast, agriculture showed a steady decline over the period.
In 1960, numbers of jobs in manufacturing were around 15 million and then rose to 20 million in 1980. After that, the figures for manufacturing sector fell to around 17 million in 2000 and 13 million in 2020. On the other hand, the retail and healthcare sectors grow significantly from 6 million and 2 million to 10 million and 5 million in 1960 and 1980 respectively.
In 2000, the number jobs for retail and healthcare dramatically increased to 15 million and 11 million respectively, and then experienced the same figure of approximately 15 million in 2020. The other sector for the agriculture job continuously decreased from 6 million to 3 million during the period 1960 and 1980. It showed a slightly fall in 2000 and reached on 1 million at the period of 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features and making relevant comparisons across the four sectors. An overview is provided, noting that manufacturing started highest and declined, while retail and healthcare grew significantly, and agriculture steadily decreased. Key data points are accurately cited, such as manufacturing beginning at around 15 million and peaking at 20 million in 1980, and retail reaching 16 million by 2020. However, there is a minor misinterpretation in the final paragraph regarding agriculture, stating it reached 1 million in 2020 when the data indicates around 2 million. Despite this minor inaccuracy, all four sectors are covered and supported with appropriate data.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response has a clear overall arrangement and is divided into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, followed by an overview, and then detailed body paragraphs. Cohesive devices are used to signal transitions and comparisons, such as 'Overall', 'In contrast', 'After that', and 'On the other hand'. However, referencing and cohesion are sometimes faulty or mechanical, as seen in the phrasing 'reached the peak at the beginning in 1960 after that declined over the period of time' which lacks punctuation and smooth linking. Paragraphing is adequate, but internal sentence linking could be improved for smoother progression.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using topic-specific terms such as 'manufacturing sector', 'retail', 'agriculture', and 'healthcare'. There are attempts to use less common vocabulary like 'considerable growth', 'dramatically increased', and 'fluctuate', though some word choices and collocations are slightly imprecise, such as 'numbers of jobs in manufacturing' or 'slightly fall' instead of 'slight fall'. Spelling is generally accurate, and occasional vocabulary errors do not impede communication.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including introductory subordinate clauses ('In 1960, numbers of jobs...'). There are several grammatical and punctuation errors throughout the text, such as missing spaces after periods ('time.Retail', 'contrast, agriculture'), incorrect verb forms ('sectors grow significantly' instead of 'grew'), and minor preposition issues ('reached on 1 million' instead of 'reached 1 million'). However, these errors rarely impede communication and the intended meaning remains clear.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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