Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The given line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four Sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

After Analysing the line graph, it can be observed that in the year 1960 there were 2% jobs in millions in Healthcare. The jobs in Agriculture was 6 percent whereas jobs in Retail was also same in 1960 in the US But the jobs in manufacturing shown a high percent at 15% of jobs in million. In 1980 the jobs in healthcare were risen up at 5% in US whereas Retails jobs were also increased at 10% and jobs in manufacturing was at 20% in the US.

Moving further in the year 2000 the jobs in agriculture were decline at 3% in US. Eventhough jobs in Healthcare was increased at 12% but manufacturing jobs were fallen down in the US at 18%. In the year 2020 the jobs of manufacturing was drop down at 13% and jobs in Retail or Healthcare were

Significantly rised up at 16% in US

Overall, the jobs in Healthcare were steadily increase in the US whereas jobs in manufacturing were dropped down in the last year.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response covers all four sectors shown in the graph and provides data points for multiple years (1960, 1980, 2000, and 2020), which satisfies the basic requirements of Task 1. However, the student incorrectly uses percentage signs (%) instead of millions for the figures (e.g., '2% jobs in millions'). Furthermore, the overview provided in the final paragraph is very basic ('jobs in Healthcare were steadily increase... whereas jobs in manufacturing were dropped down') and misses key comparative trends. While the main features are touched upon, the lack of accurate unit representation and a superficial overview limit the score to Band 5.5.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is divided into an introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief overall concluding paragraph. However, logical progression is hindered by awkward transitions and dense listing of data points without clear grouping or comparative structure. Cohesive devices are minimal or repetitive (e.g., starting multiple sentences with 'In the year...'). Paragraphing is attempted, but internal cohesion is often faulty due to mechanical referencing and confusing phrasing, placing this criterion at Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The student uses basic economic and trend-related vocabulary such as 'jobs', 'sector', 'increase', 'decrease', and 'decline'. However, there are frequent word choice and collocation errors, such as 'jobs in healthcare were risen up' and 'jobs... were significantly rised up'. The misuse of percentage signs throughout the text indicates a lack of precision in handling data terms. The vocabulary range is limited and minimally adequate for the task, yielding a Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The response contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but grammatical accuracy is weak. There are frequent errors in verb forms, tense consistency, and prepositions, such as 'were decline', 'jobs in manufacturing shown a high percent', and 'jobs in Retail or Healthcare were significantly rised up'. Subject-verb agreement errors are also present (e.g., 'the jobs in Agriculture was'). These errors occur frequently and occasionally impede communication, justifying a Band 5.0.

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