Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
the line grapgh illustrated the information about jobs in four different sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
overall,there is noticebale increase in health care jobs from 1960 to 2020 as you can see jobs for manufacturing had increased to some extent but than from 1980 to 2020 it decreased and from 1960 we had 5 million agrticulture jobs but late in 1980 it steadly decreases and till 2000 it remained constant and after that there is a small decrease you cn see in 2020 and in 1960 we had 7 million jobs of retail and it increase over the period of time
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The response is significantly under-length, containing only 107 words compared to the required 150-word minimum, which severely restricts the development of the answer. While the student attempts to report some main features, such as the increase in healthcare jobs and the decline in agriculture, the information provided is brief and lacks detail. Furthermore, there are inaccuracies in reading the data; for example, the student states that retail started at 7 million in 1960 when the chart shows it at 6 million, and agricultural jobs are misreported. Due to the severe word count penalty and the lack of a proper overview or fully supported comparisons, this falls into Band 4.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The text is written as a single, uninterrupted block of text without any paragraphing. Cohesion is very weak and mechanical, relying heavily on run-on structures and conversational fillers such as 'as you can see' and 'after that there is a small decrease you cn see'. There is a lack of logical progression or clear structure to guide the reader through the data. Pronoun referencing is also imprecise. This level of organisation and cohesion corresponds to Band 4.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently reusing terms like 'jobs', 'sector', and 'increase' or 'decrease'. There are spelling errors such as 'grapgh', 'noticebale', 'agrticulture', and 'steadly', alongside typographical errors like 'cn'. The range of vocabulary is extremely limited and minimally adequate to convey the basic subject matter, matching the descriptors for Band 4.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The text is dominated by simple and poorly controlled compound sentences connected by conjunctions like 'and' or 'than' without proper punctuation. Capitalisation is missing at the beginning of sentences (e.g., 'the line grapgh', 'overall,there'), and there is a total lack of full stops or commas used correctly to demarcate clauses. Grammatical control is poor throughout, resulting in frequent errors that strain the reader, aligning with Band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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