Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 5.5)

The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four different sectors, namely,manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare,over a period between 1960 and 2020.

Overall,there was a sharp increase in the healthcare and retail sector throughout the timeline while the manufacturing sector fell steadily.

In 1960, around 15 million jobs were available in the manufacturing sector and had a highest percentage of jobs at that time. In contrast, around 6 million jobs were available in the agriculture and retail sector and had a half number of available jobs as compared to the manufacturing sector. The Healthcare sector had around 2 million jobs which is lowest at that time.

In next 20 years, In retail and healthcare sector number of employment opportunities was sharply raised approximately to 10 and 5 million. After that there was a more climbed in both sectors approximately 5 and 6 million by 2000. In 1980, Huge number of job opportunities available in the manufacturing sector were almost 20 million. In contrast agriculture sector had lowest percentage in the number of job availability. Meanwhile, employment opportunities were started declining in manufacturing sectors approximately 17 million by 2000 but agriculture followed a climb of 1 million in job opportunities.

In 2020, The healthcare and retail sector had largest sectors in the terms of job opportunities. while, the manufacturing sector had 13 million employment opportunities. Agriculture sector had the lowest employment opportunities approximately 2 million by 2020.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The student successfully addresses all parts of the task by selecting and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. An appropriate overview is provided in the second paragraph, highlighting the upward trends in healthcare and retail alongside the steady decline in manufacturing. Key data points are generally accurate and supported with figures from the chart, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million in 1960 and peaking at 20 million in 1980. However, there are some minor inaccuracies or vague data descriptions, particularly in the description of intermediate years where expressions like 'more climbed' are imprecise. Nevertheless, the main trends and comparisons are adequately covered, fulfilling the requirements for Band 6.5 or 7.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement and follows a logical chronological progression from 1960 through 1980 and 2000 to the final year of 2020. Paragraphing is utilised to separate the introduction, overview, and body details. However, cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or awkwardly handled, such as 'In next 20 years' and 'After that there was a more climbed'. Additionally, referencing and linking between sentences occasionally feel disjointed, which disrupts smooth progression. Overall, the organizational structure is adequate for a Band 6, though greater flexibility in cohesive ties is needed for a higher score.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, successfully using topic-specific terms like 'employment opportunities', 'manufacturing sector', and 'healthcare sector'. Attempts are made to use less common vocabulary, but these are often accompanied by word choice and collocation errors, such as 'had a highest percentage' instead of 'the highest number' and 'more climbed' instead of 'further increase'. There are also frequent punctuation and spacing issues related to vocabulary, such as missing spaces after commas (e.g., 'namely,manufacturing'). These errors do not impede overall communication, placing this response firmly in the Band 6 category.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, such as 'The line graph illustrates the number of jobs... over a period between 1960 and 2020.' There are several grammatical errors and awkward phrasings throughout the text, including tense inconsistencies and faulty structures like 'had a half number of available jobs' and 'number of employment opportunities was sharply raised'. Punctuation errors are also notable, particularly missing spaces after commas and periods. While these errors occur regularly, they rarely impede the reader's ability to understand the general meaning, which aligns with the descriptors for Band 6.

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