Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The graph depicts information about number of jobs available in four different sector of economy that is manufacturing, retail, agriculture and healthcare in the United State between 1960 and 2020.

At a fleeting glance it is abundantly clear that in healthcare sector the numbers are rise continously from 2 millions to aproximately 16 million also it has highest number of jobs in 2020, the simmillar trend seen in retail sector which was risen from 6 millions to 16 millions also with yearly rapid growth in number of jobs. However in agriculture sector the number of job was 6 millions in year 1960 and after that a decline is seen in number of jobs availability which reaches to 3 millions when 2020 year came. Hence this sector has lowest number of jobs as compared to rest of sectors. Meanwhile, Manufacturing has highest numbers of job at 1960, accounting for 15milion. These numbers incline towards 20 million in next 20 years, but after 1980 the numbers stars falling and reaches to 13 millions in 2020. Taking everything in account it was clear that highest numbers of job opportunity are in retail and healthcare and slightly less in manufacturing. On the other hand in agriculture sector only 3 millions jobs available which is lowest.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The student covers all four sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, and healthcare) and reports key data points and trends across the period from 1960 to 2020. An overview is present in the concluding paragraph, highlighting the main trends such as the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture and manufacturing. However, there are some minor numerical inaccuracies in data reporting; for example, agriculture is stated to have 3 million jobs in 2020 whereas the chart indicates approximately 2 million, and retail is reported as reaching 16 million while starting at 6 million. Despite these minor discrepancies, all parts of the task are appropriately addressed with relevant comparisons, satisfying the criteria for Band 6.5 to 7.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The response is structured into distinct paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs covering the different sectors, and an overall conclusion. Cohesive devices are employed to connect ideas, such as 'At a fleeting glance', 'However', and 'Meanwhile'. However, referencing and transitions are sometimes clumsy or mechanical (e.g., 'when 2020 year came' or run-on sentences like 'in healthcare sector the numbers are rise continously from 2 millions to aproximately 16 million also it has highest number'). Paragraphing is functional, but overall progression within sentences can feel disjointed due to punctuation issues and over-long clauses. This demonstrates the characteristics of Band 6.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary for the task, successfully using terms related to economic sectors ('manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', 'healthcare') and trend vocabulary ('rise', 'decline', 'growth', 'falling'). However, there are numerous lexical and spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'continous' instead of 'continuous', 'simmillar', 'milion', and 'aproximately'. Word formation and collocation errors are also present, such as 'sector of economy that is' and 'number of job availability'. While the range is sufficient to convey the main features, the frequency of errors places this firmly in Band 5.5.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The response includes a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, attempting relative clauses and comparative forms. However, grammatical accuracy is weak, featuring frequent errors in tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and articles (e.g., 'in healthcare sector the numbers are rise', 'Manufacturing has highest numbers of job at 1960', 'only 3 millions jobs available'). Punctuation is also problematic, with several run-on sentences lacking proper terminal punctuation or comma splices. While meaning is generally clear despite these errors, the high frequency of grammatical slips prevents the score from reaching Band 6.0.

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