Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrates the information about the number of jobs in four sectors of economy namely, manufacturing, retail, agricultureand healthcare in the United States. It gives the data from 1960 to 2020 respectively.
The units are measured in millions.
Overall, it is crystal clear from the graph that manufacturing was highest, while employment in healthcare was minimal .
Intersting point is that healthcare and retail jobs rate is identical.
Furthermore, in 1960 healthcare was employeed with 3 millions, manufacturing has reached a high of 20 millions job in 1980. Moreover, retail in mid 19th century was 5.5 millions, but in 1980 it rose up to 10 millions job literacy rate. Although agriculture sector in jobs has declined from1960 to1980 which is almost 2 millions.
However, in 20th centure manufacturing sector has also dropped to 16 millions and later in continuted came dowm in 2020.
Retail jobs has dramatically increased to 15 millions in 2000 and slightly grew in same as healthcare in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response attempts to cover the main features of the graph, presenting an overview and mentioning data points across the four sectors from 1960 to 2020. However, there are several inaccuracies in data reporting. For instance, the student states that in 1960 healthcare was employed with 3 millions (the graph shows 2 million), and refers to the 'mid 19th century' when discussing 1980. The overview is also contradictory, initially stating manufacturing was highest and healthcare minimal, but later noting that healthcare and retail jobs rate is identical by 2020. While the general trends are acknowledged, the imprecise data reading and expression limit the development of ideas, placing this performance at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The essay attempts a paragraph structure with an introduction, overview, and body details, but the logical progression is hindered by fragmented sentences and abrupt transitions. Many sentences are written as isolated paragraphs or single lines (e.g., 'The units are measured in millions.'), disrupting the flow of the text. Cohesive devices are used minimally and sometimes awkwardly, such as 'Furthermore' and 'Moreover' linking poorly related data points. Referencing is also occasionally unclear, such as pronoun or time-reference confusion ('in 20th centure'). Paragraphing is disjointed. Overall, the arrangement shows some organization but lacks clear overall progression, corresponding to a Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is limited and repetitive, with noticeable errors in word choice and collocation that affect precision. Examples include 'employeed with' instead of 'employed', 'jobs rate' instead of 'number of jobs', and the strange chronological slip 'mid 19th century' for 1980. There are also typographical and spelling errors such as 'Intersting', 'continous', and 'centure'. While the student manages to communicate basic economic sectors (manufacturing, retail, agriculture, healthcare), the frequent lexical errors and lack of flexibility restrict the score to Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures. Most complex sentence attempts are flawed or confused by mechanical errors, such as 'Although agriculture sector in jobs has declined from1960 to1980 which is almost 2 millions', which lacks a main clause completion. There are frequent grammatical errors involving prepositions, verb forms, and tense usage, such as 'manufacturing has reached a high' (past event requiring simple past), 'in continuted came dowm', and 'Retail jobs has dramatically increased' (subject-verb agreement error). These frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader, placing the grammar at Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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