Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-17
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 6.5)
The line chart illustrates the clear fluctuation among four sectors over the 60 years from 1960 to 2020. The retail and healthcare sectors had performed very well in last decades while manufacturing and agriculture sectors had experienced downward trends in number of jobs.
In 1960, Retail and agriculture sectors had 6 million of jobs. The retail sector had shown an impressive growth in employment rate, increased to 10 million in 1980, surged to 15 million and peaked in 2020 with 16 million of jobs. While the agriculture sector's jobs number declined over the period. The jobs number was 6 million in 1960, decreased to 3 million in 1980 and remained constant in 2000, faced downward movement in 2020, the final recorded figure was 2 million.
Furtherover, The manufacturing sector had the top number of jobs, 15 million in 1960 and peaked to 20 million in 1980, experienced a declined in 2000 to 16 million and last recorded figure of jobs was 13 million in 2020. The Healthcare sector had provided only 3 million jobs in 1960 which surde to 5 million in 1980, increased to 11 million in 2000 and climbed to 16 million in 2020. The most grown sector was healthcare between given dated.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 7.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 7.0
The response successfully addresses all parts of the task by reporting the main features, trends, and comparisons across the four economic sectors in the US between 1960 and 2020. The overview effectively captures the overall downward trends in manufacturing and agriculture, contrasted with growth in retail and healthcare. Key data points, such as the peak of manufacturing at 20 million in 1980 and the surge in healthcare to 16 million by 2020, are accurately cited. While minor details like the exact 1960 starting point for healthcare (stated as 3 million rather than 2 million) contain slight discrepancies against the visual data, these do not impede the overall accurate reporting of main trends and comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The response is logically organized with a clear overall progression. It begins with an introductory paragraph containing an overview, followed by body paragraphs grouping the sectors logically. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. Cohesive devices are utilized, such as 'While the agriculture sector's jobs number declined', 'Furtherover', and 'The most grown sector', though some transitional phrases are awkward or non-standard (e.g., 'Furtherover'). Referencing is generally clear, ensuring that the reader can easily follow the comparisons made between the different economic sectors throughout the sixty-year period.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms related to economic trends such as 'fluctuation', 'downward trends', 'impressive growth', and 'surged'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation errors, such as 'had performed very well in last decades' instead of 'over the last few decades', 'jobs number' instead of 'number of jobs', and the non-word 'Furtherover' instead of 'Furthermore'. Spelling and word formation are generally acceptable, but these minor lexical inaccuracies prevent the score from reaching a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The response displays a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, including subordinate clauses introduced by 'While' and 'as'. There are several grammatical errors throughout the text, particularly with verb tense selection and prepositions, such as 'had performed very well' instead of 'performed well', 'declined in 2000 to 16 million' missing a noun form ('a decline'), and incorrect tense usage in 'The healthcare sector had provided only 3 million jobs in 1960 which surde to 5 million'. Despite these errors, meaning is rarely obscured and communication remains clear.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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