Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of jobs in four sectors of economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. The figures are presented in millions.
Overall, it was clear that, Retail and Healthcare sectors were growing over the period Whereas, Manufacturing and Agricultural sector experienced a decline .
In 1960, there were 15 million jobs in the manufacturing sector which increased to 20 million in 1980; after they started falling and decreased to approximately 13 million in 2020. In contrast, the retail sector stood at nearly 6 million in 1960, and started increasing and reach nearly 16 million in 2020.
In 1960, nearly 6 million jobs were in the agricultural sector which sig decreased to approximately, 3 million in 1980 and despite a decline throughout the period and stood at nearly 2 million in 2020.
While, the healthcare sector experienced a gradual increase, starting at approximately 6 million in 1960 and increased to 15 million in 2010 and kept growing till 2020 reaching 16 million jobs.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The student successfully addresses all parts of the prompt by presenting an overview and reporting the main features of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. Key data points are accurately cited, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million, peaking at 20 million in 1980, and declining to 13 million. However, there is a minor inaccuracy in the final paragraph regarding the healthcare sector's starting point, where it is stated to begin at 'approximately 6 million in 1960', whereas the visual data shows it closer to 2 million. Additionally, the overview is slightly disjointed due to punctuation errors ('Whereas, Manufacturing...'). Nevertheless, the task is adequately fulfilled with clear comparisons.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is arranged coherently, following a logical paragraph structure with an introduction, overview, and body paragraphs dedicated to specific sectors. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'In contrast', 'Despite', and 'While', though some punctuation and referencing are faulty, particularly in the second paragraph with awkward capitalisation and comma placement ('Whereas, Manufacturing and Agricultural sector experienced a decline .'). Paragraphing is generally appropriate, though paragraph four is a bit fragmented. The overall progression of information is clear and easy to follow.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary suitable for the task, successfully using terms like 'fluctuate', 'decline', 'gradual increase', and 'sectors of economy'. However, there are some minor word-form and spelling issues, such as the abbreviation 'sig' instead of 'significantly' and an awkward phrase 'jobs were in the agricultural sector which sig decreased'. Less common lexical items are attempted, but occasional inaccuracies in word choice and collocation prevent the score from reaching a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, utilising clauses introduced by 'while', 'after', and relative pronouns. However, control over punctuation and grammar is inconsistent. There are several punctuation errors, such as unnecessary commas ('approximately, 3 million') and sentence boundary issues ('in 1980; after they started falling'). Grammatical errors do not severely impede communication, but they occur frequently enough to typify Band 6 performance.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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