Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 1 question

The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.

Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020

Student answer (Band 4.0)

The assigned line chart depicts the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020. The data is given in millions.

Overall, after having a fleeting glance,over the allocated line graph, it is crystal clear that the agriculture sector jobs of the economy was started from 1960 and this job sector shows highly rise, instead of other job sectors, as well as the most of te falling stage of the economy is healthcae job sector.

To commence with, this chart describes te number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US nation , [redacted phone]. First and foremost, healthcare sectors shown in down and starts from 1960 year, it observed 6 million jobs, after that it shows steadily down in 1980, then it describe rapidly same number of million jobs in 2000, at the end in 2020 it shows slightly plunge. After that, the agriculture job sector in the economy is registered 5 million jobs it is crystal clear that it is inclined, in 2020 it is noticed slightly go down and observed 3 million.

Furthermore, the retail sector of the economy shows begins from 1980 year and register 5 million of jobs, after that it is rapidly climb in 2020 year it is noticed 15 million number of jobs. then the last one most growing sector is manufacturing, ir starts fro 1980 year and noted 15 millions number of jobs, In 1980 it is inclined and observed 20 millions of jobs, At the end, in 2020 year it describes slightly down and it is registered 13 millions number of job in the US.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The candidate attempts to report the main features of the line graph showing job numbers in four US sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, the response contains severe misinterpretations of the data, such as claiming that agriculture showed a 'highly rise' (when it actually declined steadily from 6 million to 2 million) and completely confusing the trends and starting points for healthcare, retail, and manufacturing. While an overview is attempted in the second paragraph, it is largely inaccurate and contradictory. The data reporting is erratic, mixing up figures and years throughout the body paragraphs. Consequently, the response does not adequately or accurately cover the visual information provided, aligning with Band 4 descriptors for task achievement due to these major factual inaccuracies.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The response is divided into paragraphs, including an introductory overview and separate body paragraphs for different sectors. However, the logical progression is frequently disrupted by confusing signposts and contradictory statements, such as 'after having a fleeting glance, over the allocated line graph'. Cohesive devices are mechanically applied and often inappropriate, as seen with repetitive transitions like 'after that' and 'then'. Referencing is also faulty, making it difficult to follow which sector or time period is being discussed. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion within paragraphs fails to maintain a clear, logical flow, which places the response in Band 4 for this criterion.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is very basic and heavily repetitive, with frequent word-formation and collocation errors (e.g., 'highly rise', 'slightly plunge', 'rapidly climb'). The candidate struggles to select appropriate terms for describing trends and data fluctuations, frequently misusing verbs and adjectives (e.g., 'observed 6 million jobs... after that it shows steadily down'). There are also spelling errors such as 'healthcae'. While the vocabulary is sufficient to convey a general topic, the constant lexical inaccuracies and limited range restrict the score to Band 4, as errors frequently impede precise communication.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The response displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying mostly on simple or faulty complex sentences. There are frequent, heavy grammatical errors throughout the text, including tense confusion ('jobs of the economy was started'), missing auxiliary verbs ('sectors shown in down'), and awkward prepositional usage. Punctuation is also problematic, with run-on sentences and comma splices. Because errors are very frequent and often distort the intended meaning, the grammatical control corresponds to Band 4.

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