Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph decipts that how many jobs availabled in various fields of economy in the US from 1960 to 2020
Overall , it can be clearly seen that , the highest jobs were available in manufacturing while in healthcare lowest jobs oppotunity.
To begin with, there was 15 millions people worked in manufacturing sector of economy in the US in the year 1960 whereas retail and agriculture sector jobs were just more 5 millions. Healthcare jobs number was half than agriculture and retail. All sectors number was increased except agriculture in the year 1980.
After that , number of jobs in manufacturing declined tremendously from 20 millions in 1980 to roughly 14 millions in 2020. In contrast retail and healthcare jobs number rose massively from 10 millions and 5 millions to both were reached little more15 millions in the last year respectively.there was a minor changed of agriculture job numbers with dropping to approximately 2 millions in 2020.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The student addresses all parts of the task by reporting on the four sectors over the given timeframe and making comparisons. An overview is attempted in the second paragraph, stating the highest and lowest general trends, although it is slightly brief. Key features are selected and reported, such as the peak of manufacturing in 1980 at 20 million, and the rise of retail and healthcare. However, there are some inaccurate readings of the data, such as claiming healthcare had the lowest jobs opportunity in 1960 (it started at 2 million, while agriculture was 6 million in 1960 according to the text, but healthcare actually started at the lowest point of 2 million). The student attempts to cover all main trends, placing it at a Band 5.5 to 6.0 level.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is organized into four paragraphs, including a brief introduction, an overview, and body paragraphs. However, logical progression is hindered by choppy sentence structures and punctuation errors, such as missing full stops, extra commas, and spaces before punctuation marks (e.g., 'Overall , it can be clearly seen that ,'). Cohesive devices are used minimally and somewhat repetitively (e.g., 'To begin with', 'After that'), and referencing is occasionally unclear. Paragraphing structure is attempted, but overall cohesion is faulty and mechanical, aligning with a Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate for the task, with terms related to economic sectors ('manufacturing', 'retail', 'agriculture', 'healthcare') and trends ('declined tremendously', 'rose massively'). However, there are numerous word choice and collocation errors, such as 'decipts that how many jobs availabled', 'jobs oppotunity', 'more 5 millions', and 'minor changed'. These noticeable lexical errors and awkward phrasings cause some difficulty for the reader and restrict the score to a Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors, including missing auxiliary verbs ('there was 15 millions people worked'), incorrect verb forms ('availabled'), preposition errors, and missing articles. Punctuation is also poorly managed throughout the text, with stray commas and missing terminal punctuation. Because errors are frequent and occasionally impede smooth reading, the grammar fits the Band 5.0 descriptors.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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