Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The line graph illustrates the number of vacancies in four departments of the economy in the United States over a period of sixty years.
The workforce is presented in millions.
Overall, the graph highlights that the manufacturing industry and agriculture industry continually declined, while both healthcare and retail were substantially growing between 1960 and 2020.
To commence with, initially in 1960, the manufacturing sector was providing 15 million of jobs then next twenty years it slightly rose up to 20 million; after that, it continually declined till 2020. The agriculture department statrted at five million jobs in 1960 later it declined and remained the same for 40 years and in th next 20 years it slightly down.
On the other hand, Healthcare and retail sectors significantly increased and leveled off in 2020. In 1960 healtcare satred with about 2 million and retail began with 5 million from 1980 to 2020 there were increases doubled figure.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The student successfully covers all parts of the task by reporting the main features and trends of the four sectors between 1960 and 2020. An overview is provided in the third sentence, which correctly notes the opposing trends of manufacturing/agriculture versus healthcare/retail. Data points are generally cited accurately, such as manufacturing starting at 15 million and peaking at 20 million in 1980, and healthcare growing significantly. However, there are some minor inaccuracies and omissions in the data reporting, such as stating that manufacturing and agriculture continually declined (agriculture actually remained stable at 3 million for a period) and minor typos in numerical readings. Despite these minor lapses, the key trends and comparisons are clearly articulated, earning a solid Band 6.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is organized into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction and overview, followed by body paragraphs grouping the declining sectors and the growing sectors. Cohesive devices are employed to guide the reader through the data, such as 'Overall', 'To commence with', and 'On the other hand'. However, referencing and cohesion occasionally become mechanical or slightly awkward, as seen in phrases like 'then next twenty years' and 'in th next 20 years it slightly down'. Paragraphing could be more evenly structured, but the overall arrangement remains coherent and easy to follow, aligning well with the Band 6.0 descriptors.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully using terms related to economic sectors and trend descriptions such as 'workforce', 'substantially growing', and 'significantly increased'. However, there are notable vocabulary and spelling errors, such as 'statrted' for started, 'healtcare' for healthcare, and awkward collocations like 'providing 15 million of jobs' instead of 'jobs'. While less common vocabulary is attempted with some success, inaccuracies in word choice and spelling prevent the response from achieving a higher band, placing it firmly at Band 5.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over structure. Examples include compound-complex sentences in the overview and body paragraphs. However, grammatical errors are frequent throughout the text, including missing prepositions, tense inconsistencies ('satred', 'began'), and missing auxiliary verbs ('it slightly down'). These errors occasionally cause slight friction for the reader, though they do not completely impede communication. Because complex structures are often faulty and errors recur across sentences, a Band 5.0 is appropriate.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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