Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.5)
The given graph describes the change in number of jobs in four different sectors of economy in the US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall, in 1960, manufacturing conrtibuted highest in the US economy in terms of number of job. While there was very low significance of other three sectors. However, in 2020, jobs in retail and agriculture has risen and reached more than one leading sector which is manufacturing. Although jobs in healthcare decreased over this given time in the US.
In initial year, one major sector in the US is manufacturing with 15 millions jobs. Number in jobs in retail and healthcare sector were marginal, around 6 millions. Furthermore, Agriculture contributes lowest in terms of jobs in the US.
Number of jobs in manufacturing increased for short term and stood at 20 millions in 1980. However, jobs in this sector started declining gradually after 1980 and stood less than 15 millions. Retail sector experienced drametical growth till 2000 and increased by marginal amount in 2020 and stood at more than 15 millions jobs and became highest job sector. similar trend can be seen in the healthcare sector. However, jobs in agriculture experienced gradual downfall during this years.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The student attempts to address all parts of the task by reporting the main features and trends of the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are notable inaccuracies in the interpretation of the data. For instance, the overview incorrectly claims that 'jobs in healthcare decreased over this given time', whereas the graph clearly shows a substantial upward trend from 2 million to 16 million jobs. Furthermore, the description contains factual misreadings of the data points, such as stating that retail and agriculture 'reached more than one leading sector' in 2020. While an overview is attempted, these data misinterpretations limit the overall development and precision of the response, placing it at band 5.5.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The response is divided into logical paragraphs, beginning with an introduction, moving to an overview, and then detailing specific years and sectors. Cohesive devices such as 'Overall', 'However', 'Furthermore', and 'In initial year' are employed to structure the text, although some transitions feel a bit mechanical or are used awkwardly. Paragraphing is adequate, but logical progression suffers slightly due to confusion within the overview paragraph regarding which sectors grew or declined. Overall, the organizational structure is coherent enough to follow, but cohesion can be refined for smoother transitions.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, successfully using terms such as 'sector', 'economy', 'gradually', and 'downfall'. However, there are multiple spelling and word choice errors, such as 'conrtibuted' instead of contributed, 'drametical' instead of dramatic, and awkward phrasing like 'very low significance of other three sectors'. Less common vocabulary items are attempted, but inaccuracies in collocation and spelling occur frequently enough to occasionally impede natural flow, restricting the score to a 5.5.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, using conjunctions and introductory phrases like 'While there was very low significance...' and 'Although jobs in healthcare decreased...'. However, there are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('Number in jobs in retail and healthcare sector were...', 'Agriculture contributes lowest'), missing articles ('in US', 'in initial year'), and tense inconsistencies. These errors cause some difficulty for the reader, though the core meaning remains partially intelligible.
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