Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The line graph illustrate number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
In the period of 1960 to 1980 all jobs were increase without healthcare jobs . in 1960 healthcare jobs were about 2 million and retails and agriculture jobs were more than twice of healthcare jobs , In that period manufacturing had less than thrice of retail and agriculture jobs.
Manufacturing jobs are sharply decrease after a reach pick point in 1980. Retail jobs are continue increase still 2000 after they slightly increase. health care job rose and they end up with retail jobs . they were same in 2020 abut 16 million jobs. agriculture jobs were constant declined in whole period . health care jobs overtook the agriculture jobs .
In overview , healthcare jobs and retail jobs were increase in all time of period , where manufacturing jobs which was the highest in 1960 but after decades it was declined than starting points above 12 million jobs was available in 2020 it was overtook by retail and healthcare jobs at end.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The student attempts to cover all four sectors of the economy between 1960 and 2020, providing an overview at the end of the text. However, there are some inaccuracies in reporting the data. For instance, the statement that 'all jobs were increase without healthcare jobs' between 1960 and 1980 is incorrect, as manufacturing and retail increased, but agriculture actually declined from 6 million to 3 million. Additionally, the phrasing regarding trends and peaks is sometimes vague or confused. Despite these shortcomings, the main features—such as the growth in retail and healthcare and the decline in agriculture and manufacturing—are generally identified, placing the response at a Band 5.5 level.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is divided into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and an overview. However, the logical progression is hindered by poor transitions and weak cohesive devices. Sentences are often disjointed, such as 'In 1960 healthcare jobs were about 2 million and retails and agriculture jobs were more than twice of healthcare jobs , In that period manufacturing had less than thrice of retail and agriculture jobs.' Paragraphing is attempted, but the placement of the overview at the end is standard. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and punctuation errors disrupt the flow of ideas. Cohesion is mechanical and at times faulty, earning a Band 5.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student uses a limited range of vocabulary relevant to the visual data, repeating basic terms like 'jobs', 'sectors', 'increase', and 'decrease'. There are noticeable errors in word choice and formation, such as 'reach pick point' (peak point), 'continue increase' (continued to increase), and 'constant declined' (constant decline). Less common vocabulary is attempted with limited success. While the vocabulary is adequate to convey basic concepts about the graph, errors in word formation and collocation cause some difficulty for the reader, fitting the Band 5.0 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writing relies mostly on simple sentence structures, with occasional attempts at complex forms that are frequently faulty. Examples of grammatical errors include subject-verb agreement issues ('The line graph illustrate'), tense confusion ('jobs were increase', 'jobs are continue increase'), and missing auxiliary verbs. Punctuation is also problematic, with spaces before commas and missing periods. These frequent errors restrict the range of structures and occasionally impede communication, placing this criterion at a Band 5.0.
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