Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
The graph illustrates information about various sectors of economy namely Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture,Healthcare in US from 1960 to 2020.
Overall,Retail jobs recorded the highest numbers followed by Healthcare and Manufacturing related jobs surged before declining. Whereas, Agricultural department constituted the lowest figures.
In 1960 Manufacturing sector started at 15 million jobs and reached a peak of 20 million in 1980,before diiping to approximately 16 million in 2000 and hit a low of roughly 14 million in 2020.Conversly,Retail jobs experienced moderate figures,and maintained a steady upward trend reaching to 15million jobs in 2000 before surging to around 16million jobs at the end of the period.
Meanwhile,Agricultural sector started at 5 million jobs in 1960 and continued to decline throughout the period and Healthcare sector started at around to 2 million jobs and showed a significant growth over the given time frame,maintaing identical numbers with the Manufacturing department.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempted to cover the main trends in the four economic sectors between 1960 and 2020. However, there are several data inaccuracies; for example, retail did not start at 6 million in 1960 according to the graph, and the peak of manufacturing is misstated. Furthermore, the response is under the 150-word minimum requirement at 144 words, which leads to a slight penalty in this category. The overview is somewhat confused, claiming retail recorded the highest numbers throughout when healthcare and retail actually converged at the end of the period. Consequently, the task is addressed only partially, fitting Band 5.0 descriptors.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The text is divided into paragraphs, which helps establish a basic structure. However, the logical progression is hindered by poor referencing and punctuation errors, such as missing spaces after commas (e.g., 'Manufacturing,Retail,Agriculture,Healthcare'). Cohesive devices are used, but sometimes mechanically or awkwardly, as seen with 'Conversly' and 'Meanwhile'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the overall arrangement lacks smooth transitions between ideas, particularly in the body paragraphs where data points are lumped together rather than clearly contrasted. These issues reflect Band 5.0 standards for Coherence and Cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student uses a limited range of vocabulary appropriate for describing charts, relying on basic terms like 'jobs', 'sector', 'increased', and 'decline'. There are some attempts at less common vocabulary such as 'constituted', 'surged', and 'fluctuated' (though 'diiping' is misspelled), but overall word choice is repetitive and basic. Spelling errors ('Conversly', 'diiping', 'maintaing') and punctuation slips are present, though they do not completely impede understanding. This range and control align well with Band 5.0.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but many complex constructions contain grammatical errors, missing prepositions, or awkward phrasing (e.g., 'Healthcare sector started at around to 2 million jobs', 'maintained identical numbers with the Manufacturing department'). Punctuation and spacing errors are frequent, particularly around commas and numbers. While the meaning can generally be parsed, frequent errors in grammar and mechanics cause some difficulty for the reader, placing this response firmly at Band 5.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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