Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-18
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 5.0)
This line graph demonstrate about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020
Manfacturing increased initially but then declined considerably. In addition healthcare showed a steady increase throught a period .Retail generally rise, By 2020 retail and healthcare becomes a significant reason of employment as compare to manufacturing.A manufacturing economy is increased by 15 to 20 million in 1980 and then gradually declined through-out till 2020.moreover agriculture economy is also fall during this period.
The main reason in risen of economy of US is manufacturing and healthcare sectors,these give a greater opportunities for job and make a reason of a country success.
Healthcare sector is continously increasing to approximately 3 million to 16 million and become a significant source of contry economy.
Agriculture sector is decreased through-out these years. its declined from 6 million to arround 3 million.
In conclusion, the main source of country economy between 1960 to 2020 is retail or healthcare sector.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The student attempts to report the main features of the graph, identifying general trends such as the rise in healthcare and retail alongside the decline in agriculture and the fluctuating pattern in manufacturing. However, there are notable inaccuracies in reading the data. For instance, the student states that the healthcare sector increased from approximately 3 million to 16 million, whereas the graph shows it started at 2 million in 1960. Additionally, the overview contains unsupported external commentary regarding the 'success' of the country, which goes beyond factual reporting. While the main sectors are mentioned, the lack of precision in data extraction and the inclusion of subjective commentary place this response at Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The response is divided into several short paragraphs, but the overall organization lacks a cohesive structure. There is an absence of clear paragraphing logic, with single-sentence paragraphs appearing frequently (e.g., 'Agriculture sector is decreased throughout these years'). Cohesive devices are either missing or used awkwardly, such as 'In addition healthcare showed a steady increase throught a period .Retail generally rise'. Progression is hindered by repetitive statements and abrupt shifts between sectors. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and punctuation errors further disrupt the flow. This performance aligns with the Band 5.0 descriptors for coherence and cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is relatively limited and repetitive, relying heavily on basic terms like 'increase', 'decreased', 'sector', and 'economy'. There are several spelling and word-choice errors, including 'Manfacturing', 'throught', 'contry', and 'arround'. The student attempts some less common vocabulary, such as 'significant' and 'gradually', but these are often accompanied by collocation or grammatical errors (e.g., 'a significant reason of employment as compare to manufacturing', 'risen of economy'). The lexical range is minimally adequate for the task, reflecting a Band 5.0 level.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student uses a mix of simple and attempting complex sentence structures, but control is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including subject-verb agreement issues ('retail and healthcare becomes', 'agriculture economy is also fall'), incorrect prepositions ('in risen of economy'), and tense inconsistencies ('is increased', 'is decreased'). Punctuation is also problematic, with missing full stops and incorrect capitalization. These frequent errors cause occasional difficulty for the reader and prevent the response from achieving a higher band, fitting the Band 5.0 profile.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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