Band 4.0 IELTS Writing Task 1 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.0 · Cambridge IELTS 21 · 2026-09-19
IELTS Writing Task 1 question
The graph below gives information about the number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US between 1960 and 2020.
Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
Number of jobs in four sectors of the economy in the US, 1960-2020
Student answer (Band 4.0)
The line graph tracks changes in the number in four various categaries of the economy in the United States during the period of seven decades (1960 to 2020).
Overall, it is evident that manufacturing takes leads thought out the beging, but at end it fell down. However, healthcare and retail both begins there ecomomy together, meanwhile, retail and agriculture mearjed in the end of year.
To begin with, the trend of manufacturing leads throughout 2 decade in the jobs sector, which was 15 millions and its pecked at 20 millions.There is nociable changed can be seen that it was fell throughout the years. Fallowed by retail and agriculture tracks begin there jounery at same point, which was above the 5 millions in sector of jobs. In 1980 to 2000, manufacturing jobs sectors sebsequently incline, throughout the 20 years it was stayed constance. However, the noticiable change in agriculture sector, decline at below 5 millions, after that it moderately stable between 1980 to 2000.
The healthcare sector economy in the US, jobs rates sated at nearly 3 millions, the trend sky rocaked through out the years.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 4.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 4.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 4.0 |
| Overall | 4.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0
The student attempts to cover the main trends in the line graph, identifying manufacturing as starting high and retail and healthcare showing growth. However, the response suffers from severe data inaccuracies and misinterpretations. For instance, the student states that manufacturing 'pecked at 20 millions' (which is correct for 1980) but then claims it stayed constant when it actually declined. Furthermore, the description of agriculture and healthcare contains confusing and incorrect figures (stating healthcare started at 3 million when it started at 2 million, and claiming retail and agriculture merged at the end of the year). The overview is weak and confused. These significant inaccuracies pull the score down to Band 4.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0
The essay is divided into paragraphs, but the logical progression is frequently disrupted by confusing statements and poor linking devices. The student attempts cohesive phrases like 'To begin with' and 'Overall', but referencing is often unclear (e.g., 'retail and agriculture mearjed'). Paragraphing is attempted, but the body paragraphs are disjointed and lack clear organizational flow. The repetitive and sometimes incoherent structure makes it difficult for the reader to follow the progression of data. This places the response in Band 4.0.
Lexical Resource — Band 4.0
Lexical control is extremely limited, with numerous severe spelling and word-formation errors throughout the text. Examples include 'categaries' instead of categories, 'thought out' instead of throughout, 'beging' instead of beginning, 'pecked' instead of peaked, 'nociable changed' instead of noticeable change, 'fallowed' instead of followed, 'jounery' instead of journey, 'sebsequently incline' instead of subsequently increase, 'constance' instead of constant, and 'sky rocaked' instead of skyrocketed. These vocabulary errors significantly strain the reader and impede comprehension, fitting the Band 4 descriptor.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0
The text displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, and simple sentences are frequently constructed with fundamental errors. There are persistent issues with tense consistency, subject-verb agreement, and clause linking, such as in 'retail and healthcare both begins there ecomomy together' and 'the trend sky rocaked through out the years'. Punctuation is basic, and complex sentence attempts almost invariably result in heavy grammatical errors that distort meaning. This level of grammatical accuracy and control corresponds to Band 4.0.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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